Bad night, bad day.

I didn’t get to bed until around 2am. I spent most of the night in the chatroom, having a freak out. I was so anxious.. My heart was pounding and my head was spinning. I ended up drinking a little alcohol, just to try and calm myself down.

I conciderd suicide. I even started to do it. I took 6 tabs of my meds, then I started feeling very sick. I tried to take more, but I just couldn’t keep them down. I ended up passing out.

I didn’t sleep well. I woke up a few times during the early hours of the morning, mostly due to an upset stomach. When I was walking back and forth from the bathroom, I was very unsteady on my feet. I feelt dizzy.

My alarm went off at 7am. I was meant to be going to classes today. I told mum that I was feeling sick and didn’t want to go. And that is the truth. I have been feeling sick and very strange in the head all morning.Like dizzy and lightheaded. I slept a bit more. Someone knocked at the door, I didn’t answer. I couldn’t bring myself to get out of bed. I have a headache.

I told the chatroom something last night, that I haven’t told many people at all. I’m affraid that something bad will happen now.

I should have gone to class. I don’t know what I’m going to do. I don’t want to do anything. I just want to curl up and die. right here.

I"m in the house all day by myself today.