My son started seeing a counselor 2 weeks ago, he pretty much had no choice with the trouble he has been in at school. But just in the past two weeks I have seen a big difference in him, I haven't recieved a call from the school since he started counseling and he's doing his homework rach night, as well as trying to change the way he where's his clothes. He hasn't seen his father in over two months now, his father just has even tried. I know hit hurts my son, there are times when he gets upset an cries but I think he's realizing that it's not his fault or anyone's else's that his father is not in his life. But he's also understanding that his father is sick with a disease that has control over him at this time in his life, I try to not take up for his fathers absence but to just ket him know that he is having problems and that he's sick and hopefully in time that he will get better, but that his dad still loves him.
I talk to him when I think he has to much on his mind, I can tell that it helps him, I;ve told him he's not alone I had a father that made some bad decisions in his life with his kids as well as we knew of his sickness. I tell my son that everyone has to make there decisions in life and you have to make your own mistakes, but when you continue to make the mistakes then you have to change your decisions and choices or go down the same road so many others choose too and loose theirself in the process. If you hang with people who you know are doing wrong, and when everything gets pinned on you and they get off scott free then are they really your friends, much less friends you want to be around. He seems to be doing better at everything, he doesn't have many friends but maybe now that he's changing his choices and his attitude that will change as well………
Thank you all for your support, I haven’t truly had the time to check on the Alon Group in my area. My 15 year old daughter in the same time frame that David has been gone she refuses to see her father, I am dealing with being in and out of court for that as well as court for child support. I’m trying to get her in counseling as well, with the issues with her father and the fact that she feels totally abandoned by David which she has always loved more like a real dad. My life is somewhat really crazy right now, I don’t know if I’m coming or going. I was in counseling for about a month in a half but with all that is going on with the kids I have to put there needs above what I may need, I’m out of my meds so I truely can’t sleep at night and I just stay so tired all the time. I’m trying to open my on cleaning services as well work my 1st time job, so hopefully things will work out with that, it’s my only option left to save my house.
My ex did come by my job Friday 1st time I-ve seen him since I confronted him at the store about the letter I wrote him and how much of a toll he’s taking on the kids. Stated he came by to see how I’m doing and ask about the kids, and planned on seeing them Saturday. I told him again that our son is in consuling and that he can’t just see them then not see them again for months, that it only makes things worse on them. Then had the nerve to ask me for some cigs, I was very decent the whole conversation even at that point but completely irrate at the sametime. I advised him that I didn’t have any extra to give him and to go get his so called friends he’s always around to give or but him some. He asked a few more times and I told him no I have a house payment and bills to pay and no food in the house for my kids that he’d have to do without like we have. I took my stand with him, maybe that sounds like a small one to others but I’ve never been able to say no to him and I am now able to do that. He will also still tell me he loves me and misses me and I just turn my head and look away and say nothing, that alone has been hard to do but I just can’t deal with us always being the leftovers in his life and the safety net. He never showed up this weekend to see the kids, I guess since he feels he has no grip on me anymore there’s no sense on stopping by…who knows. I was told by his stepmom this weekend that he has admitted to being on drugs but told his family that I was doing them with him….they know me and also know of my heart problems and knew that was a lie. But to put me in with your use of drugs and act as if I am doing them as well is being a croward.
I will always love him and be in love with him, but the person he has become I have no love for at all because I don’t know this person……I wish I could say that I’ll never let him back in my life but I can’t because if he got cleaned and got the help he needs I know he would be the person we all loved so much again…..I pray for my kids and for him