I am new so I figured I should share a little about myself. I am a 19 year old female who was been battling with depression and anxiety since I was diagnosed in the 8th grade. I have tried many different medicines prescribed by doctors and go to weekly counseling appointments. Although I have always struggled with my anxiety, it seems as if in the past two years social events have become a bigger and bigger problem for me. I started dating my boyfriend about two years ago(ex now) and with all of the -negative things that have been said in the relationship, I am now self conscious and feel everybody must feel that way about me. I lost many of own my friends because of how toxic the relationship was and we had shared the remaining friends. I still get along with those people, but I avoid hanging out with them in case he is there. I am constantly worried and paranoid about what people may think of me, and that has been my biggest stress lately. It has gotten to the point where I will make up any excuse possible not to go out or attend events with groups of people. I am very nervous for the snow to fall because my depression gets significantly worse in the wintertime. Every time I feel like I am making progress, something comes up and I am set back to square one. I realize there are a lot of people out there who have it way worse, but life as me just isn’t enjoyable anymore. I joined to hopefully connect with others going through the same type of struggle and to see that I am not the only one. I hope to help others on here just as much as they help me, and maybe together we may be able to cope with our struggles and possibly overcome some of them.

2 Comments
  1. alexsophia88 4 years ago

    Well, hey there! Welcome. ^_^! I want to congratulate you on coming here to share your struggles. As you will see, you are certainly not alone and, yes, knowing we are not alone either and that there are hopeful fellows like you, here, definitely helps. I’m sorry you’ve been going through such difficult times. Keep in mind that maybe your ex wasn’t knowledgeable or educated enough to treat you the way you deserve but that it doesn’t reflect what others think about you, automatically. I know it still hurts but, at the end of the day, going through these things, you will learn that it’s true what they say: “Those that mind don’t matter and those that matter, don’t mind”. Stick with the people who get you and don’t judge you. You deserve no less. Also, I used to minimize my suffering or process by comparing it to others, saying that there had to be so many people that have it worse than I do but looking at it that does nothing for them nor me, does it? Just as you wouldn’t be mean to someone who went through something they thought was less hard than your own experience, but still hurt them enough, right? Our pain is our pain and it deserves just as much care and attention than anyone else’s because it’s real and it matters. If we ignore it or downplay it because of the notion of it being “less than”, then that definitely opens the door for it to become bigger and bigger, eventually, don’t you think? Everyone’s life experiences and pain levels are valid. After all, you wouldn’t tell a beloved friend to “quit their whining because there’s others out there who have it worse”, if they came to you for respite, right? I’m sure you would seek to comfort and support them, so why on Earth would you deserve any different? Just a thought. Hope it helps! ;)! Thanks for the friend request. I hope we can be of positive influence to each other by just sharing of ourselves. I also wonder, I’ve never been in snow but I have heard of these lights that are made specifically for people who suffer from seasonal affect disorder. Ever looked into getting one? Might help. Well, look forward to more of your entries! Take care. Much love, always, Alex.

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  2. mandy86 4 years ago

    Hey lady!! I’m a tad older but I was about 23 when I started having really bad anxiety and OCD issues (had them as a child as well but no as bad as in adulthood) anyways I totally remember feeling that was in my early 20’s . I had been in a toxic relationship that left me feeling like I was crazy and that there was something wrong with me . I also felt the same way about going to events or out to do things . I got pretty depressed because I felt like I was “Wasting ” my good years and missing out on so much.

    I had been doing well for a while but since August it’s been rough again. Yes people have it worse I’m sure but that doesn’t mean our pain isn’t important too. Reading these blogs and talking to people who can relate helps on both sides . 🙂

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