First time posting on here, I hope someone can share their experiences and how they have dealt with similar struggles. So for the past year and a half I have been having a very hard time dealing with social anxiety. I finally decided to cut way back on my drinking, and to get myself in shape. Here I am a year or so later and I am definitely proud of myself on how far I’ve come, but I still have some things I need to work on. It just seems like I really improve in some areas, but then other areas seem to suffer. During last year I was also suffering from depression, which has almost completely improved, but then as my depression was improving, my anxiety was getting worse. Now I am at the point that I am only spending time with people that I know very well, and even then I struggle to hold a conversation, I feel so much pressure to say something, but I end up having a mental freeze sometimes and I can never think of anything to say. This isn’t even what really bothers me because I have been making steady improvements and I know that I will get to where I want to be, it will just take time. What has really been bothering me is where me and some friends will be hanging out and they will usually invite some other people with whom I’m sort of acquainted with, and some who I don’t know. What will happen is everyone is talking and bulls******g with each other, telling each other to go f*** off and things like(jokingly of course) but when I say something like that to someone they have taken offense and a few fights have broken out because of it. Has this ever happened to anyone else? it seems like everyone else is allowed to say what they want, but as soon as I say something and its suddenly not cool for me to say it. for example we are playing card games or something and I win a couple games and someone will say hey go f*** yourself(jokingly), but when they win a couple games and I say the exact same thing back, they take offense to it and sometimes it will escalate to physical confrontation. I am always joking when I say things like this, but for some reason when I say things like this, more often than not, people get upset. I just want to be able to joke around and bulls**t just like everyone else. I’m normally the quiet one in the group, but sometimes I’m having a good day and will talk more than usual. Is it because I’m normally the quiet one, or I’m looking at them strangely? I would appreciate any advice.

 

1 Comment
  1. quiet1 4 years ago

    I can’t offer any advice but I can certainly understand how you feel because I’ve been there.

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