Goodmorning everyone ! My mood is somewhat mixed as I'm wondering what kind of day this is going to be, mom has a new nurse coming here in 30 minutes or so, so I wonder how that's going to workout. Its just another day of basically wishing I could get out into the world, just enjoy life alittle bit. I have a man that wants to go out with me, he's a lawyer, anyways I just can't imagine dating someone being in this finical mess I'm in let alone the mental state I'm in. I suppose I'm afraid of what he might think about what a mess my life is and myself, this house is so nasty and in need of work, I'm embarassed to have anyone come here.My mom has become extremely nasty, there's food sitting out dirty dishes from her eating late at night, there's not an empty bed, except for mine and her hospital bed which is in the livingroom when you walk in, bam there she is in bed, not because she's bed ridden she just sleeps all day and stays up all night. There's not a clean table in the house we eat her sitting on the end of the couch that you can actually sit on me in the recliner, the middle room is full of garbage and cleaning items, etc., there are items all over the floor, now we have roaches, I HATE yes HATE roaches ! Now with warmer weather the grass will need cutting but she was robbed of all the yard equipment so the grass will be ass high and its just a disgrace, my grandparents would be floored at how thie place looks. I truely don't no what to do, mom will not let me clean this place up and of couse it only adds to my misery and depression to live in filth. If i had a car i could at least meet ppl out of the house where they aren't expose to this place right off the bat, because if I personally walked into a persons home and it was like this I'm not sure what I would do. I wasn't raised like this and I always kepy my place clean and organized.Sometimes when the paramedics come they look around and have strange looks on there faces, ppl never want to be here for long, its really quite sad. Ppl do judge this sort of thing and you are labeled as white trash or now days a horrider. Any advice? What shall I do?