Today was a very bland day. I live with my brother, sister, and father currently, all in his one bedroom apartment. My mother lost her house in November, and since then I have not had my own bed. I share with my brother for the most part, he's six years old.
It's frustrating not having a space in which I can just, relax. It's very tense, and my sister feels it too. We often fight and argue, and the apartment is filthy. We try to clean it, but my father and brother are no help and we've generally given up. It's very difficult, and the lack of space gets on everyone's nerves. It's tough sleeping, and slightly embarrassing that I can never have any friends over.
Even the fire marshal came in and called the place too small, but my father isn't doing much to change it.
My mother picked up my brother and sister and took them out for the day, and I did some cleaning, but I feel like it's a futile effort and that I'll be stuck here forever. I can't imagine living like this for my entire life, and not having a space or place to sleep to myself. I need the room, I need an area to close off and stay in, but with both of my parents in one bedroom apartments it's not looking possible. I sometimes get upset about it, but there's not much I can do. I spent the rest of my day lazing about, because I'm not motivated to do much, I have no money and no way to get around.
I also spent a good part of the day talking to the one I'm madly in love with (see previous installment). No bumps or drama today, which was good. It was simply some quality time. We talk about the most random things together, train missiles and toy frogs, anything that intrigues us, even book socks as seduction caps.
I feel fatigued today, very dry and bored. I don't like it, it's just another day. I haven't been working a lot lately, cut hours and such. That and I have been sick. I just hope every day isn't like this, boring and repetitive. I only hope that what I want to do with my life works out. Wish me luck with my life!