just another day that seems hard, it's friday and I normally love fridays but since being pregnant it just another shit day, also it the day my 2 oldest girls go to their farthers (we split 5yrs ago) and now i have shared custody of them so he gets them a week and same for me hate fridays leave me sad and stressed coz i don't have control over what is happening to my girls when with their farther he is a shit arse excuse for a dad but nothing i can do about it so this my main reason for my depression as he took off with them when we split and i didn't see them for 8 months long time for a child and parent not to seee each other!!!! anyway just another complicated part of my life that keeps me at a level of stressed and grumpy it tears me apart to be honest. My partner is going away for the weekend and i couldn't care less that i be at home alone with our 3yr old alone i much prefer my own company anyway but i know it not good for me as i am an extreme over thinker and causes me to spiral down. I think my partner cheated on me awhile ago He swears he din't but i get this feeling he did and he has text messages on his phone to another girl that suggest he wants to do something with ths chick. I don't trust easy due to numerous things previous to this relationship so many issues going on in my head it hurts alot of days and comes out in my mood swings and they can be extreme, wish i had a medication that actually worked I hate taking the stuff but the only thing that keeps me on an even keel!!!! sun is shining and that makes me happy but not really happy wish all these feeling would go away I wanna drink till i can't drink no more