I've convinced myself my boyfriend dosn't love me.

Ok so i have the most amazing boyfriend he is honestly everything i ever wanted he is never mean to me he hates to argure he is just a really sweet guy. Here lately i have been feeling really down i dont think i'm very pretty and my boyfriend is tottally hot and i'm scared that im not hot enough or somthing for him and he is just going to leave me for the next best thing but he keeps reassuring me he wont and we've been together 4 almost 2years. I have also been having these issues i keep thinking that if i look at something or think something or touch something the wrong way that he is going to be with one of his ex Girlfriends and i keep having these gross sexual images run through my head of him being with them and it really pisses me off and i almost get mad at him but its in the past it was before me and i love him so much so y does it keep bothering me so bad ive been trying for months to get past this please give me any advice i'll take it. Also i keep thinking if i look at or say or do something that might be offensive or something that may be offendingg GOD then he will put My boyfriend with one of his exes or with someone else but me because i don't deserve him and when i think about all this its gets me really upset and fustrated and i feel like or have these thoughts that i am mad a God nut i'm soooo NOT it just feels that way or like i am blaming him for how i feel or all the crap i think but i feel like its my OCD and its something maybe he wants me to overcome and deal with instead of always asking for reassurance and taking the easy way out.

Thanks so much for reading all of this and agian any advice or anything is much apprciated love u all!!!!!

2 Comments
  1. Pleasedont33 10 years ago

    I have very similar issues with the man in my life, too. But I'm not gonna get into that..lol. Everytime you feel like asking him to reassure you about something your ocd has sprung on you, stop. Stop the thought as soon as it pops up.

    Ask yourself if it is a reasonable thought ( we know it most likely is not), and it it isn't, then look at the facts…

    1) he loves you

    2) he has stood by you for 2 years

    Try to find all of the positive aspects of your life, with him and family and friends.

    I am trying so hard every single day, most every minute, not to let my obsessive/unjustified/ocd driven thoughts destroy the best friendship of my life..It's hard, and somedays I am too overwhelmed. Those days are very sad for me, because I can see how I am picking away at this happiness..yet I cannot stop it. I don't bother him with too many questions, I just retreat inward and become s bit of a bummer to be around..But I am trying to teach myself how to think straight…  : )

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  2. smh2010 10 years ago

    Hey like the rest of you gals, I've had the same thoughts.  But you have to realize like all your other OCD thoughts, they are just thoughts, they are not true.  Now that my OCD is more in control, I haven't really thought that lately, proving to myself that this really isn't a part of me or the truth.  As for God, don't worry He made you you're not going to scare him off or offend him that easily.  I'm a Christian so my belief is that he loved you so much he died for you, so no little thought or anger is going to keep his grace from you.  In fact I'm sure your pain hurts him/her worse than your anger.  Just realize even if you were not as attractive (which I'm sure you are equally as hot, OCD loves to lie) you'd still have sooo many other wonderful qualities that no one else could give your boyfriend.  Remember to develop these and the OCD won't have a place to stick its ugly head.  And as far as the images, I've learned not to be afraid of mine.  I let them come and go, and when I don't obsess they don't bother me as much.  Easier said then done.  I know your strong so keep fighting the OCD.  Wishing you peace and wellness.

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