So my boyfriend that I mentioned in my last post that I dated for over a year has realized that he screwed up big time. We're not together yet, but we're working on some things. So I'm really happy about that, but it also causes me to do rituals because I don't want to mess anything up with trying to work things out. But the main thing I want to talk about in this post is paranoia and possesiveness.
Before we broke up (and none of thishas anything to do with the break-up because he knows I have OCD and he would actually try to understand.) my OCD caused me to beparanoid and possesive all the time. I would always be paranoid that he liked another girl or would flirt with other girls or something behind my back, even though I know he would never do anything like that.Well that caused me to possesive and somewhat controlling. (i.e. I would only want to hangout just me and him. No one else.) And he would always get frustrated atme while I was getting frustrated at myself also. I would also always have to have reassurance that he didn't like someone, or that he wasn't cheating on me with someone.
And now that we're working things out, I had another one of those spells last night where I was really paranoid. He is good friends with one of my best friends also and they hung out some while him and I weren't together. Somehow I convinced myself that they kissed or did something and it was so hard for me to believe him and I don't know why. And I know if I keep on doing this I'm just going to push him away.
And this isn't the first time this has happened. It was also like this in my relationship i was in my senipr year of high school. But that guy wasn't so understanding about it all….
It just frustrates me so bad that I get paranoid and possesive so easily!!! When there is no reason to and there never has been!! Ugh!!! Has anyone else ever had these problems?