well i confronted my friend….my best friend of 19 years (on again off again due to time and distance and circumstances)……i told her how she had been rude and inconsiderate of me and my husband……i said it nicely and said i simply did not want to be around her and this new person in her life because this is the only time she acts this way. she seemed to take it fine….that was a week ago. we’ve had one conversation since then and we usually talk daily………..to top off all of this my father flipped out & assaulted me. yes i understand he refuses to take his medication he desperately needs & this is what caused the outburst. but i don’t want to be around someone who will physically harm me, regardless of who they are…this all started over their other daughter who is hated by the rest of the family due to her 41 years of lying, conning, hypochondria, and abusing people. she never helps them, only ask for money or use of their crap. at this point, i voluntarily worked at least 20 hours a week in my moms store for free and whatever else they needed me to do. she lied about me to passing acquaintances, for no reason other than her petty fear of anyone liking me more than her. these people are not even in our lives any longer. this is how insignificant they are, but it was worth hurting me in an aware that is already broken, to try to win their favor…my parents have since decided the acquaintance made up the whole thing (even though my sister heard her say many of the same things) & choose to coddle this grown pathological liar…..i rented part of my parents store to start my own business. all i asked is that they not have the other daughter in the store when i was there. my mother refused and purposefully invited her to the store to try to force us to get along. when i refused to be around her & pointed out my legal right to not have people on my property i don’t want, my dad started cussing me. i said (note only used words) he was a f*&^%$#@ a(*&^%$ and that i was tired of them believing her despite all evidence to the contrary & making me feel like crap. he then proceeded to slap me, hit me, grapple me to the ground & put his knee on my chest. he is a big well trained military man. if my husband had not come up behind him & pulled him off me, i don’t know what would have happened….in all of this my parents feel i am still being petty. that i need to be “mature” and come crawling back to them. they have done nothing of course…..so i have now had to relocate my business, go further in debt, and be all upside down. i hate not being all organized & put away and on a schedule….my counselor says that my parents commit “emotional incest”. basically placing me as the adult to take care of their needs since i was at least 7 or 8 maybe younger…..i haven’t spoken to them in 3 weeks and i feel like the worst child ever. even though i know to speak to them again, i will have to say i was totally wrong, they were right, and make tremendous amends. i can’t do this either…..i believe in God (a bit differently than traditional Christians, it’s too much to explain) having a greater purpose in our going through fires. i am trying to forgive them. but regardless of forgiving, i can’t be involved in their cycles……….goodness this is long & draining and no work is getting done…..sorry i had to let some of this out. you really seem like you understand. even if you don’t typed anything back. i know there are people reading this, thinking supportive thoughts, and just knowing that, just getting all down in black & white helps. thanx b:dizzy: