STALKERS
Current mood: thoughtful `~~~~~~~~~~~~was bloging on MySpace and I have a counter there and it tells me how many time a certain person visits my profile so I wrote this for them ///or anyone that talk to me I guess///////
No not Celery stalks lets keep celery out of this one!!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
… people that poke around your profile …more then once … so they can feed some empty spot in their soul ??…~~~~~~~~
some need to know more then they have to.??. ~~~
or are they glad that there is someone out there that is more fucked in the head , so you can have the pleasure of feeling more normal???.~~~
sure I may change my profile everyday ,~~~
But hey that is just me expressing myself.. so I do not hide my feelings.. I wear them like a wet suit all exposed and painful~~~
. like I let you cut open my brain and am letting you explore my mind and then let YOU sit back and judge me…~~~
Well hell that is why I stay /run away from people in the firts place .. God Forbid someone sees NOTHING when they look inside me .. ~~~
I am the only one that is supposed to know I am an empty shell…~~~
The part that gets me is How can one Feel so Empty but yet Feel so much , hurt, anger, rejection, joy , happiness, lust , love… at the same time ??~~~
not all the time just flashes threw out my day depending on my interaction with other people .. I react to how they are feeling ,,if someone I talk to is sad , I will become sad and feel their pain, and want to take it away , want to make them feel better..~~~
Someone is angry.. I will get and be angry right there along with you.. I will be the Louise to your Thelma. and damn the world.~~~
I have learned to go with the flow..~~~
I am thinking about what I have wrtten so far and as I look over it .. my conclusion is that ~~~
I am Empty … and I need other people so I can feed off of their feelings… sounds sorta weid but, yes, weird does make sense to me..~~~
I might be a bit off my rocker but I pride myself on my insight , and my ability to CARE so much , SYMPITHIZE so much, LOVE so hard …ect….. whith someone else ,and then bare my soul , I will tell {most}anyone anything about me or my life all they need to do is ask… if I lived in a glass house it would have been shattered many years ago… {not sure why I just put that there for some reason to me it seems to fit} ~~~
thinking again .. trying to find words to tell all you “mind stalkers” what I am , who I am , why I am… ~~~
Like right now talking about all of this if you asked me ..well DeeDee how are you feeling right now {{Thanks for asking}} I would say…~~~
and yes I actualy think thses things up easily~~
~~Okay say you are a deer hunter… you kill a deer , and skin it , and then you wrap that deer skin around you, and now that deer that was dead is ALIVE again .. well I am the deer skin… I am already dead I just need someone to atatch myself to , to feel alive , be alive..take that deer skin off again and I am empty / dead again….. just waiting for someone to wear me~~~~~~~~~
there you go all my brain stalkers , there is another chunk ripped straight from my soul… eat and be merry~~~~~~~
but one word of caution …stay away from me , because I will seduce you, and get close to you ,and have you, and then I will take your soul , because I belive I do not have one~~~~~