the other day, after my gf had called me and told me we need a break. that night she called me from a psychiatric intervention center, told me she needed me and that she was sorry, that she didnt wanna take a break and she wanted to be with me. well that was the good news. till the wicked witch got ahold of it. her mother. her mother heard this, and aas i later learned, it was her mother pressuring my gf to make us take a break from each other in the first place, she didnt want to. anyways, the news reached her mother, that we were back together, and that selfish witch flipped. I guess in her mind, i was making her daughter worse, even though, i saved her daughters life, literally, many, many times. her mom threatened to kick my gf out of the house, and send her to some home in Detroit, where ive met people whove been there and gotten raped. and her mother knew that. that people get raped. Her mother called me. i kept my cool as much as possible. she said, and its the most self-centered thing ive heard: "my daughter is worse, and is stopping me from turning my life around, and its your fault." in a nutshell. first of all, im not making her daaughter worse. we both have problems, but were both workign through them, leaning off each other. secondly, what sick f*ck gives up on their child, sends them to somewhere they know rape happens, because its hard. for the sake of themselves? what? im not even a parent and im a better parent than her, cuz i dont give up on loved ones. so, she said to me, sometimes, we have to do things we dont want to. and i said, "like what, pushign your daughter off a cliff and telling her to fly, cuz thats what youre doing". she ranted bout how i maade her daughter worse. i raised my voice and said sternly, three times, as she was babbling. i saved her life last week. i saved her life last week. i saved her life, last week. her mom simply said, i save her life every day. she doesnt, at all. my gf hates talking to her mom, and if i werent here, and im not saying this to be selfish, i wish it wasnt like this but, shed be dead. there is no talking to her mom about problems. she lectures you, and then when you state your opinion, she shrugs it off and ignores it, because if it doesnt agree with her opinion, or what she believes is right, it cant be true, cuz heaven forbid shes wrong. theres no talking to the woman, half the time. anyways, by the end of the call, infuriated, she told me, well the data shows, you need to get better for yourself, before youc an get better for others. i told her f*ck the data, im different, and hung up. i proceeded to flip a chair, kick a full back backpack, scream swear words, and repeatedly punch a wall, till my knuckles bled. and so now, i cannot communicate with the girl i loved, but the last we spoke, we vowed to see each other again, and that we wouldnt give up waiting for each other, even if it took years. so here i am, alone, puppetmastered into giving up my gf. for no good reason. and also, i begged my parents to take her in. shes 18 i said if we both got jobs, i payed her rent, we paid her rent. they still said no, we cant support someone else. so now. i did the only thing i could. stop talking to her for who knows how long, months? years? in order tog ive her a place to live till she moves out. and im beyond sad at this very moment. i was so angry. but now, im sad. i woke up in a panic. thinking about her, which btw is hard to do, im losing my mind and can barely remember her, but at the same time i could never forget her fully. but i need her, not to make me happy. but i need her because i love her, because shes the one person who is there for me. its not some simple teenage love that i feel i need her. im different, and shes different, than your average people. ive put my faith and belief in her right now.but, although i promised to get through this till we meet again, it isnt fair and i have no idea how to do this. it seems that i always get the bullshit cards handed to me in life. i miss my babe 🙁

3 Comments
  1. Mentally_Scorn 9 years ago

    i dont know if she went on and couldnt reply, or her mom weont on and read my message. but my gf was on facebook, and it said the chat message i sent her was read. but she didnt answer, now shes offline. i wont do it, i cant, but this situation makes me feel really suicidal, it makes me wanna call it quits, i want to hurt myself. i cant take this anymore

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  2. ancientgeekcrone 9 years ago

    Sounds as though your gf's mother is narcisitic.

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  3. Mentally_Scorn 9 years ago

    not sure what she is. but i cant do this at all. anything. i mean aside from my heart hurting, aside from losing her, im losing my mind and i nor anyone can figure out why. i dont mean just ocd. i feel like something else is wrong and i dont have a clue what. i feel like im forgetting about my gf, about everything, a heavy cloud of confusion and a broken, clouded, messed up brain, combined with ocd and a hurting heart, is all i am. i wouldnt qualify me as a person. i need help and no one can even help me. my friends keep telling me to think positive. that i can do it. and theyve  been through their own shit, they know how hard life is. but no one knows what it feels like in my mind, losing my mind, losing everything i care about, losing my sanity combined with severe ocd, neither of which i can conquer. they tell me i can chance all that, how my mind feels, how evrything is going, by thinking positive, over and over, nonstop, but i cant do it. im scared

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