Music. Sad; Very sad music. That's all I hear. I can't seem to be able to feel better. But everything is going great. I broke my moms kitchen window last weekend. I said it was an accident, but I hadactually done it on purpose. But that wasn't enough for me. A knife. I saw a sharp steel object in my hand. I wanted to cut so badly. And I did. I cut myself. Now I've broken a promise. A few days later I do it again. Now I'm wondering how it is that I'm supposed to explain this to him. He won't be happy with what I've done. I promised him I wouldn't do it. Hopefully he doesn't notice them. I'll just make sure the light in the bedroom stay off. I'll keep myself out of bed in the morning next time I visit. Keep my shirt on. I'll have to make sure that Travis doesn't see it either. He'll tell him about it. Maybe I can come up with an excuse as to how I got them. I'll tell him it was the broken glass. I slipped and fell on my arm where the pieces of glass were.Danny is smart. Hopefully he won't catch my lie. He always knows when I'm lying.
Our anniversary is tomorrow. I got selfish a week before our anniversary. I should have at least waited till after. Then it would have been a bit more acceptable for me to cut.
A few weeks ago he told me to get some help. But I don't need any help. I've tried and nothing seems to help. But they can. They both keep me happy when they're around.
Cutting myself has made me feel worse. I've broken a promise that I made to my partner. Promises mean a lot to him.I should never break a promise.