I've had about 4 relationships in my life and they all turn out the same… filled with lies and disappointments. My current relationship with my girlfriend started out filled with the promise of a healthy relationship because she also has experienced similar relationships. We started off slow before even dating and actually waited a great deal before moving in together.
when she and i decided to move in together, her neice and her two little girls were also living with her. i asked her to talk to her niece before we decided to move in together because this was a decision that would affect them too. my girlfriend promised me she would but i later learned she didn't. so when it came time for me to move in, it was without notice and they were pissed off. at first they disliked me but when the truth came out that my girlfriend didn't talk t them the hurt feelings were already in place and resentment already has settled. that was just under a year ago. things have improved a bit but not much.
now here we are again a year later and she does it again. she invites her brother to come stay with us. he is recently out of prision, on the run, drug addict, i know he is using in the house but keeps it hidden from his sister. he also has other crimes that he was found guilty of. its mostly those others that makes me not want him here. face it, I DONT WANT HIM HERE!!!! I DONT FEEL SAFE HERE!!!!! i pay rent and buy all the groceries and utilities. if he earns money… he calls his drug contact and goes shoots up. i can't understand how my girlfriend can't see how they are enabling his addiction by paying him money to do chores areound the house. if he earns money, he should be paying us rent, utilities, and food.
so as a result, my girlfriend and i are fighting1111 OMG! she asked me what is wrong with me… why am i sleeping and crying all the time. i told her i can't talk to her about it because she will become defensive. well it all came out yesterday and today… i was right. she became defensive. made it about herself and how it was her fault that she didnt ask for my permission. i never asked her to ask for my permission… i only ask that she ask fr my opinion and value it before acting on it.
i'm hoping and praying that God will fix what is wrong and make her understand my thoughts and concerns. I do love her and want to spend my life with her but i am also realistic and knw that we need help.