So, yesterday I tried to bring up to my mom that whole blow out we had and all I got was the same shit. She’s sick of me always talking about how I am bipolar… She has no faith in me because she thinks that me getting a part time job is going to make me relapse… she thinks if I stop exercising I’m going to get fat again…. She thought when I said I wanted to do part time that I was going to only be working 2 days a week even though I worked part time at Dollar Tree before and that was 5 or 6 days a week, 5 hour days. She’s just assuming all these things about me. Then she put words in my mouth and said that I said FIRST how she acts like God and that’s not true. I was trying to get her to stop arguing with me. She said I act like God and I kept asking “What?” because my brain literally would not compute. I told her I cut myself really bad and beat my head on the wall so bad I had a raised forehead, a bruise and a cut. I told her if I said that first why would I hurt myself so bad? That makes no sense! She said “Well, that’s not how I remember it.” And even with all this being said and done my dumb ass still said I’m sorry just because I wanted to has out the problem right then and there. She didn’t say sorry to me! FUCK! Whatever, nothing I can do about it now. This is crazy. So, I still just have as many questions as I did before. Still confused, none of this still making any sense. She’s like “Well, I tried explaining it to you.” Well, Mom, it’s so FUCKED UP! UGH! At least I got the job. Hopefully, my background check doesn’t fuck me in the end, but everyone there loves me. So maybe they will give me a fighting chance. The supervisor even said “I think everyone deserves a chance. I’m just praying that after she sees what’s on my record she still feels the same. I will still advocate for myself though. It was one night of my life. I have never been in trouble before or after that night. I am not the statistic of a felon. I have completed probation, IOP and I see a psychiatrist for my mental health. Fingers crossed, I am praying. I want this more than anything in my life right now.
SecretLifeOfNAME, , Depression, Bipolar, Career, Obesity, Questions, Religion, Therapist, Weight Loss, 0