There are many days when i am awake and in deep thought, i sort of withdrawel into my mind. I don’t know if this is connected with my OCD, but i think it is. Its kind of weird, i will be thinking of something, going over and over with it in my mind, and then i am transported to like a whole new world of my mind. Its kind of like on the show Kung Fu where Qui Chan Chan would dreamescape back to the past to discuss things with master Po. Its really weird, and many times insightful. Everyone I ever met, be it real person, tv character, fiction, and non-fiction and people i never met. I call it, “where the gods live” and i am going to mount olympus. It is important to know i am a pagan and believe in many goods and spirits and not one god who rules over all, I believe people who think that tehir is one ruler over all is evil and need to be avoided. What happens is i will withdraw and mentally go to a different place. Often times i start arguing with the spirits to make a logical point and then, i will return to the real world, hotting and hollering, and i will quickly clance around th eroom and se if anyone is watching. If there is I just smile and tell them, don’t worry, I’m just prving a point. sometimes altohugh it will seem like seconds go bye, in reality whole chunks of time go by. This happens when i dream and when I am at the movies. Well its similar to going to a movie, when the lights go down i am mentally withdrawn from the room and locked into the movie. i feel what everyone in the movie is feeling and respond to it. One of the reesons i like to see movies at 10 pm is no one is around, so i can get emotional, which i don’t like to do in public. I don’t know why, I am afraind to show my feelings in public because i think it is bad manners to do those things in public, like kissing your lady in public, mentally i don’t like to do it becuase i have this stupid rule in my head that it is inappropriate behavior.

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