I am fourteen years old and have not been happy my entire life. I have been to two psychiatric hospitals, one of which I felt unsafe. I was molested as a kid by an aunt. I have been physically and emotionally abused by my dad up until the age of 10/11. I have been in a rut for months now, maybe years. I had a friend in which I told her this secret and now she is no longer my friend and we don’t talk anymore, mostly because I don’t want to trust her again. She hurt me so bad. Our friendship lasted three years. I have other friends, but there is no way that I am going to tell them what happened to me. My friends are really important to me, I don’t want them to leave me as my old friend did before. I haven’t seen a therapist in months, I’ve been taking medications that leave me feeling antsy. I spend most of my time in my room alone, and that makes me feel like there’s nothing for me here. I feel so alone but there are so many people around me. I just need somebody to see me and tell me to work on myself. I need a goddamned therapist, and it’s just not happening. I feel like I’m always pushed to the side. I can’t really do anything about that because my grandpa is fucking dying and my mom needs to focus on him, it’s just that I want somebody to acknowledge that I’m suffering here. I want to take care of myself, and I want to do schoolwork without feeling like I’m going to ruin my life. Sometimes I feel like I can’t breathe. I just want to feel normal again.
-
I believe
imogen, , Depression, Child, Personality Disorder, 0
i had councelling on wednesday, talking through stuff with my counceller doest help me reslove the issues as such...
-
I''d prefer death to life right now
fallen_paradise, , Depression, Domestic Abuse, Gambling, Grief, 1
I’m so goddam sick and tired of this abuse and theres nothing I or anyone can do about it....
-
Thoughts from hell
MissJennifers, , Anxiety, Anxiety, Stress, 2
My husband just left to go to his first day of work, he's just filling out paperwork and stuff...
-
Things I miss about Mom
Iris.Dar, , Depression, LGBT, Marriage & Family, Teens, Child, 6
Hey A, One of the things I miss the most about Mom, was that she tried to always think...
-
Memories
ravenblack1369, , Depression, 0
I was sitting at my computer working on a paper for one of my classes while listening to pandora....
-
One LONG Day/Night
sadviolinist, , Depression, Anxiety, Medication, Parenting, Sleep Disorders, Therapist, 0
So I take a sleeping pill tonight and conk out early, about 9:30 p.m. I'm happily sleeping when Aaron...
-
Blank Page….
sadjac, , Depression, Anxiety, Sleep Disorders, 0
Blank page Blank thoughts I try to sleep through the day. My mind My head Sometimes I know...
-
Relaxing?
deidrexx, , Anxiety, Addiction, Anxiety, Depression, Medication, Personality Disorder, Sleep Disorders, Weight Loss, 1
Wow I am so anxious lately. Really it is awful. I am trying everything both bad and good to...