So after two very good days, today is turning out to be a really bad one. I woke up to not one but two bugs crawling on my face and then of course couldn't go back to sleep and washed my face until it peeled and bled. I don't mind bugs..I have found no matter how clean you are they will still come. I live next to a nature preserve in the country so they are inevitable, and I can handle them unless they get on me or my food. Then I'm disgusted and can't seem to feel okay for a while. Also yesterday my roommate's girlfriend cleaned my kitchen spotless. I haven't had a chance to do it because I've been sick and I live with three guys so of course they aren't going to do it. Well my other roommate did not even thank her for cleaning up mostly his mess but instead screamed at her today because she didn't put the stove burners back together because she left them on the counter to dry. She got upset and left and then I had to get up and go put them back because he refused to do it him self (all you have to do is snap them back in place) and he then screamed at me because she cleaned the kitchen. He said my boyfriend and I need to clean the kitchen not someone who doesn't even live there. He always yells at me to clean, even when I just got out of the hospital, or am working. He never cleans anything. I even had to scrub his bathroom because it is the guest bath and it was so disgusting I was afraid company would be horrified. He is so rude and disgusting and I hate him. I only have to live with him because he is my boyfriends friend and kicking him out or moving out is not an option for a long time. He doesn't understand my OCD and thinks its funny to do things to make it worse. My other roommate and my boyfriend are both really supportive to me with my OCD but won't defend me when the other roommate is rude to me or starts talking bad about me. He even calls me 'nutjob' So now my anxiety is super high have had 3 panic attacks already and I don't know if I will be able to work today. I work from home because of my agoraphobia, but if I can't even handle that I'm going to end up homeless because I can't pay my rent. I don't know what to do. I feel like he is going to ruin any progress I make. I've tried telling him that he bothers me and he thinks its funny, I try to tell my boyfriend and my roommate hoping they will help and they say he's just joking with me and not to take it seriously. I find myself just wanting to punch him in the face, but I'm not a violent person. I just hope something changes soon before I fall apart.
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Anxiety/Angry Day
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Okay, I feel really irked. I’m planning this Halloween party, and it’s meant to be really fun and entertaining,...
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