Lately I have been doing pretty good, but I have also had moments of some of the worst thoughts I have ever experienced. So, I don't know whether I am really doing better or not. I have not been to a counseling appointment in months, as my counselor had to take med leave and then with my arm break and all the sickness around the house, I have just made an appointment with her for April 1. I haven't seen her since mid December. I am excited. I am ready to get back to my regular counseling appointments. And I like my counselor, so it will be really nice to see her. And I have had so many moments since mid December that I thought would be good to talk about with her. I feel like there is some huge storage tote in my mind holding all the things that have happened that I said to myself, "I'll just talk about that with my counselor". But at this moment I also feel very stressed and I am not sure why. I almost feel the anxiety I feel when I meet a new counselor for the first time. That anxiety filled with OCD that tells me they will think I am crazy or a monster or horrid and they will take me away from my son and husband and family and friends. I have no idea why I really feel this way, since I have already spent so many sessions with this counselor. But, alas, there it is. My old friend ANXIETY. I wonder what it is like to not have anxiety. I wonder if those people who don't suffer from chronic anxiety are way happier and able to get more out of life. I wonder what it is like to not be me. And now I realize I am rambling, so I will say farewell…Talk to everyone later!!!