I don't know if it's the winter weather bringing this shit back or not but it's killing me. It doesn't help that in the summer/fall I was very busy and would constantly forget to take my meds but this is what is going on. I was doing good, intrusive thoughts and impulses to a minimum. All of the sudden it's like a spike, having impulses related to HOCD, anxious tingling, fear, etc. to the point where I don't even want to look at guys. I know I find women attractive and want to be with them, but I'm worrying I am losing my attraction to them or becoming desensitized because I use porn to reassure myself I'm not gay, however because of the thoughts it often backfires. I'm trying to cut out pornography completely, not because I think it is evil or anything but I just know it is having a negative effect on me. I've always been hesitant and nervous around women, even when in relationships only because I'm nervous of doing something wrong and I don't want to be rejected…it's clear I have a lot of issues. I'm constantly assessing past encounters, "Did I really feel that?" , "Was I just in denial?" , "am just in denial now?", "What if it's all been a lie?". I don't want any of this I just want to go back to normal….I realize too that alot of this came up a couple of weeks ago when I began having a crush on a classmate, she is beautiful, cute, funny, and alot like myself. I hate this shit…I'd love for feedback. Or opinions, I know reassurance is a crutch for anxiety that doesn't help for long but any relief from this would be great. The only peace I get is in sleep.
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Overwhelmed
BeBe0227, , Anxiety, Depression, OCD, Anger, Therapy, 2
Been feeling very overwhelmed by my emotions and thoughts these days. Lately all I seem to feel is lost,...
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If only every night could work out like tonight…
charlieh, , OCD, Lesbian, Gay, LGBTQ, OCD, Sex Therapy, 3
Tonight I went to my local bar at around 7:30. I hung out with the regulars that I already...
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‘Ooh-Ooh, My Baby’s Got a Secret’
thymeoperator, , OCD, Anger, Anxiety, Borderline Personality Disorder, 1
…except really, that would be about me. It’s just the first song that popped in my head, despite not...
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‘And now for something completely different…’
thymeoperator, , OCD, ADHD, Autism, Borderline Personality Disorder, Child, Depression, Domestic Abuse, OCD, Parenting, Personality Disorder, Questions, Weight Loss, 1
I was talking to my dad about my conditions, and oh yeah i was saying that i've been thinking...
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Apparenly I am an atheist OCD pig
jeff309, , OCD, Addiction, Career, Medication, OCD, Questions, Religion, Spirituality, Therapist, Therapy, 2
I suck. Worries, lies, compromises, shortcuts, laziness, alcohol, razorblades, and mediocre (at best) personal qualifying, drugs that dont work...
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Sexual ocd…need input please…!!
emorym, , OCD, OCD, Relationships, Sex Therapy, 2
i know this sounds ridiculous. my dad wants me to sell an accordian online for him, so it is...
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THURSDAY…..
operabruin, , OCD, Depression, Stress, 1
Well, the week is past the halfway point now, and will soon be winding down, and my depression/frustration level...
My hocd is 80 percent cured . I found NOFAP community online . Only thing that has seriously worked plus no caffeine no sugar