I’m at my limit and I can’t  keep going. I can’t  find any reason to keep going no person or thing that can make me feel life is worth living. It hurts to see. It hurts to think. I can’t  even find peace. I just can’t  handle it. All I can see all I can find are ways to hurt myself reasons to feel inadequate reasons to end this. I’m 28. I lost my parents when I was a child. My love of people has made my grandparents destitute  and made me horribly in debt. My ex has left to she claims be able to spend more time with her daughter even though she says I love you to the guys she lives with up there. The last 2 coworkers where I work are perfectionists and my add/ADHD has me making mistakes all the time. Grams says just don’t  make mistakes but those 2 look for mistakes. If I go in and lose myself I could ruin the place most important  to me. While granted I would injure myself and probably feel better I don’t  want to do that. It hurts to be me. It hurts to live. It hurts to be judged unfairly. And it hurts that the only thing people around me consider is their feelings. My eyes and head hurt. I can’t  cope with the desire to end it all. I probably won’t  go through with it. However I see no reason not to. The other 2 can run the place their way failure or success I did what I could. If I died my grandma and grandpa’s debt would go down. And in the end those I matter to I only matter to for their own reasons. In the end…my death may be the best thing for me and those around me.