So i was diagnosed with panic disorder, anxiety and depression august 11, 2016. My whole life since i was a kid i had anxiety. There would be time where my anxiety was so bad that i couldnt leave my house for weeks or months if it got really bad. It would come in waves, my panic attacks. I would get them in seperate times like, everyday i would have a panic attack for a week straight and then it would go away for even possibly months. Then it would come back sumtimes for 2 months and i would get them everyday. I obviously never understood what i was going thru cuz i was juat a child and was always scared of the feeling. I started growing up and realizing that i was having constant anxiety about random things. My mind was just always racing and i couldnt help it. Towards the end of my high school year, i was leaving my classes alot to see my councilor. I was starting to get worse especially before bedtime. I would get random panic attacks and i could never , even till this day, figure out what triggers them. My mind and emotions are like a ticking bomb, I never know when they are gonna decide to just blow up… After high school i wanted to go to college but I didn’t because my anxiety started getting worse. So it has been 3 yrs that i have been out of school. Last year in the beginning of march is when my panic disorder really decided to kick in out of nowhere and ever since then i hav had anxiety 24/7 about everything… All i do from the time i wake up till the time i go to bed is worry. Im scared to go places farther than half an hour. Im scared to b in crowded places but im also scared to be alone. Im scared to go to sleep at night. Im scared to go on thru my day because i might just have a random panic attack and idky. I started medication in august of 2016 and started seeing a therapist a few months later. She told me i have like a chemical unbalance in my brain that causes random panic attacks. I don’t have panic attacks every night now like i was ever since i started medication so i gess thats a good thing but i still have them every so often. And i just wish it would completely go away. I dont want to deal with this anymore. I want to go out and do things and meet new people and enjoy my life while im young. Im tired all the time. My head hurts and so does my heart. I feel so hopeless, upset, and scared. I just want to b able to meet someone like me who understands and will talk to me because no one gets me. Im tired of people comparing their anxiety to mine sometimes because everyone has different reasons for their anxiety. Im tired of people telling me “its just anxiety, it will go away. Get over yourself, bla bla”. Every single person has anxiety, yes i know that. But not everyone suffers from it the same way. Some people have it worse like me and i know people out there have it even worse than me and i cant imagine what that must feel like cuz i already feel like i got it pretty bad.. No i aint trying to have people feel bad for me. I just want sumone to listen to me. Sumone who gets me. I feel like im trapped in my own mind and im gonna lose it.