well i have to admit where i initially forgot that i created this page i now look forward to coming home and checking it daily because so far it has turned out to be such a positive experience.  i've tried other websites and they turn out to be more like dating/sex sites which is something i've abstained from since i was first diagnosed.  i know hat life doesn't stop and that this is a life long manageable condition but i can't help but feel that if i attempt dating, let alone contemplating any sexual encounter, that i will be judged and rejected.  i'm not the type to engage in any deceitful practices so since i know i just feel compelled/obligated to tell any potential long term prospect or sexual partner about my status…and like posting my picture on this site, i haven't had the courage to do that.  so i guess abstinence is currently the best policy for me until i get over my hangups and accept the fact that the stigma is in my own mind and that i am being my own worst judge and critic.  does ignorance exist in the world? the answer is yes.  will i encounter some ignorant people if i attempt to date? again the answer is yes but by the same token there are some enlightened people who will accept me and the situation for what it is.  i shouldn't let fear dictate the quality of my life or keep me from meaningful social interaction plus not everything is about sex anyway.  i much prefer intimacy over sex…sex is easy and intimacy is the hardship because anyone can commit physically and to be intimate requires an emotional commitment which leaves one vulnerable to being hurt and most people a mortaly afraid of being hurt.

1 Comment
  1. Chetakrider 17 years ago

    Isolation induced by being + is not discussed much. I don't have all the answers but I read that you have many. I guess it's like taking a jump from a mountain cliff to hang glide. Perhaps that first jump will take one's breath away but the sensation of being free, if you will, must be worth the jump. Personally I think this is a great place to meet other positives. It seems apparent to me that most of us on here are very sincere and are reaching out to others for many different reasons. One of the primary reasons I believe is knowing that one is not alone and has many of the very same feelings. The cyber world does have some “real” reality and even cyber world dreams come true. I've witnessed it.

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