The second half of the week was pretty calm for me. Last night I snapped again. I was pulling into a pull in parking spot at the gas station, and a young woman with a cell phone stuck to her ear in a Mercedes (go figure) pulls cross ways across two parking spots, not only cutting me off, but also taking part of the spot I was heading into. When she came back out, I confronted her. She still had the cell phone stuck to her ear. She told me that if it bothered me so much to call the cops. I went back to my car to get my phone. When I opened my door, it hit her bumper. That’s when I snapped. I proceeded to slam my door into her bumper about 10, or 11 more times. All the while screaming at the top of my lungs. They heard me clearly inside the building. It’s getting to the point where I’m afraid to go out anymore. Almost everything I’ve snapped about in the last week is stuff that just rolled off my shoulder before. All intelligent beings are responsible for their own actions. That’s the law of the universe. Snapping seems to be sneaking up on me, and that is frightening me. I need to get a handle on that. If I don’t, there’ll be trouble for me. I’m hoping my shrink can help. It started before my so called friend did her thing. She had to put up with that, and didn’t need it. Everything bothers her anyway. Me snapping doesn’t help her, either. I’m starting to feel dangerous, and I don’t like it. My energy level is really low, except when I snap. Or when I’m supposed to be asleep. I can’t sleep much anymore. I wake up as soon as I lay down. Maybe that has something to do with it. I haven’t had a true happy feeling in more than a month now, either. That might have something to do with it, too. I’ll give my shrink my thoughts, and see what he comes up with. This has happened before to me, and it just went away. My goal now is to do more than wait it out. I need to chase it away, and I want it gone for good.
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Blog #1
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I can totally understand how you feel. I too snap at times. It seems that there are just too many inconsiderate selfish folks out there.