So I have an announcment.

I’ll keep this short and sweet as i’m bloody tired.

I have decided that as of today March 23, i’m going to (try) to give up drinking (again).

I’m doing this for:

a) My own physical and mental health.

b) i’m sick of having to appologise for my behaviour when i’m drunk.

c) I’m sick of the hangovers

d) I’m tired of having to hide bottles everywhere in places where i hope they never get found.

e) Alcohol is a depressant.

f) I want to have money again. I’m spending so much on alcohol.

g) I want to not have to worry about if i smell of alcohol or not.

h) For myself, no one else.

i) To gain the respect back from the people I care about.

j) To not be known as the drunk anymore.

k) To not have to worry about if the people in the bottleshop recognise me when I come in all the time.

l) To be able to think clearly again.

m) To not make a fool of myself all the time.

n) To be able to actually do the things I want to do in the future.

o) To have a future that is not in a gutter somewhere.

p) To stop the midnight snacks when i’m drunk and I want something to eat.

q) To be able to have converstions with people without them wondering if i’m drunk again.

r) To help me in stop SI’ing as its when i’m drunk i do it most.

s) To increase my chance of living, as its when i’m drunk that I’m very suicidal.

t) To not end up in a hospital needing a liver transplant.

u) So i’m not the wierd one anymore

v) To stop being sick all the time

w) So I don’t have black out and not remember conversations.

x) Maybe I can make someone proud one day

y) To have an achievment that i’m proud off.

z) So I can be me again.

aa) To find myself again

bb) To save my brain cells.

 

I don’t know how i’ll go. I’m not going to promise everything. I’m not expecting magic, and i’m keeping my expectations low.

Thats all i can think of, so much for being short and sweet.

1 Comment
  1. beecharmer 12 years ago

     Just for Today

     Just for today, I will try to live through this day only,
     and not tackle my whole life problem
     at once. I can do something for twelve hours
     that would appall me if I felt that I had to
     keep it up for a lifetime.
     
     
     

     Just for today, I will be happy. This assumes to
     be true what Abraham Lincoln said, that
     "most folks are as happy as they make up
     their minds to be." 

    (Although I am a hugh Lincoln fan he also suffered from depression, I do not think he TRULY believed this, we all know we cannot will ourselves ”happy”)
      
     

     Just for today, I will try to strengthen my mind.
     I will study. I will learn something useful.
     I will not be a mental loafer. I will read
     something that requires effort, thought and
     concentration.
     

     Just for today, I will adjust myself to what is,
     and not try to adjust everything to my own
     desires. I will take my "luck" as it comes,
     and fit myself to it.
     

     Just for today, I will exercise my soul in three
     ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and
     not get found out. I will do at least two
     things I don”t want to–just for exercise.
     I will not show anyone that my feelings are
     hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not
     show it
     

     Just for today, I will be agreeable. I will look
     as well as I can, dress becomingly, talk low,
     act courteously, criticize not one bit, not
     find fault with anything and not try to improve
     or regulate anybody except myself.
     

     Just for today, I will have a program. I may not
     follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will
     save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.
     

     Just for today, I will have a quiet half hour all
     by myself, and relax. During this half hour,
     sometime, I will try to get a better perspective
     of my life.
     

     Just for today, I will be unafraid. Especially I
     will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful,

     and to believe that as I give to the world, so

     the world will give to me.

    I wish you the best in your endeavor, this is not meant to sound "preachy" in any way but some of these words have helped me in hard times.

     

    ~*~Beecharmer~*~

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