I have battled what I thought was depression first and anxiety second since I was probably in sixth grade.

Now in my late 30's my new highly skilled psychiatrist has begun to help me reframe my thoughts into a reality that I can understand.

He has helped me to understand that what I have been dealing with has been circular thinking or in DSM IV talk OCD.

I have had various instances in life that I attributed to depression. I was hospitalized twice in a short period of time more than twenty years ago. He helped me to understand that the common theme to these depressive episodes was circular thinking or maybepure"O"

For as long as I can remember I have held myself entirely responsible for my ownthoughts and emotions.Despite taking care of my body and leading a good life and trying to feel better I just wouldn't. The harder I tried the worse the circular thinking became.My brain would get stuck on some thoughts that did not resonate with me. My psychiatrist explained to me that the circular thinking is nothing more than my brain misfiring or shooting off sparks. It was a welcome relief to know that I was not causing my own mental health issues. For years I thought getting fixed on certain thoughts was somehow my fault. He asked if he drilled a hole into my brain and stimluated the area to move my arm would I be responsible for for my arm moving. I said no and he said it is the same thing with OCD. Essentially parts of my brain are misfiring of which I can not control. Certainly viewing this as mostly if not entirely biological has allowed me a bit more peace. He advised me to start writing some fiction in which I develop a character. When I have these circular thoughts he told me to put them down on paper in the form of a little story. He advises that I do this to get the thoughts out and to not suppress them. Essentially the distressing thoughts are not mine rather those of the character. It helps me remove myself from the OCD. It has really helped so far. I tell my wife that I am either losing it or making a break through in my mental health. This is the first time in my life that I am reframing some thought patterns that I have had since I had the ability to obsess on a thought. I think I am breaking through. I know I am breaking through.