Never bore since the passing of the first person I've cared for have I been this sadden. As if my heart wish to stop. Never before have I felt this hatred for one person I not know. If I knew the person if I knew his face his name I would a spell to cast the same emotions I feel now and max them endlessly a fold. No end. No mercy. If only I could make him or her break as I am. To see the ugliness and vileness this world has become because of them. To take away the light from their heart, spirit, and soul. Rather he was gay or not he was still a good and god love man. He have done nothing wrong. The world is wrong. We placed our belief in something we can't understand and place our understanding in the hands of those who pretend to understand and stand a ground above our. Never before have I asked wondered why? Why was I born to this world where evil and pain is more appearant than good? Why is it that I feel and know the Devil more than God? Why is there so little good in my life and so much bad? They said "God only put so much you can bare" so why is so much is piled onto my shoulders to bare? Lucifer plays these games and tornment and God allows allowing him to burden and over flow me with pain. I'm not Job. I don't want to be tested this way. Why is that Lucifer get special treatment? To be allowed to toy and cause great pain upon man? His powers are great and not all man are spiritual and holy enough to for the holy spirit and prayer to fight him. I am weak both in mind, body, and spirit. But I want to be stronger. More powerful. Able to fight the demons that plagues me. Stronger faith is impossible. All I have is the faith I have now. But that is all I have. But the turn of events now will play a bitter part in the little faith I have. If God is truily there and cares about rather I believe or will continue to believe in him my brother is the stone. Question is will he allow the Lucifer the crush it or allow me the chance as he allowed Lucifer the Devil and lord of Hell, to fight him and if I lose I'll forfit my life and soul.
Hi Shirley, sorry your spirit is broken, but God does love you. Sometimes, we feel that our burdens are too heavy…but we must pray, and remain strong in our beliefs. Tomorrow is a new day, don’t give up. ((Hugs))
Honey
I'm trying but this world I hate it. Hate sharing it with such heartless people. I don't understand why I'm being put through so much. First I thought I wouldn't have a boyfriend then the man I thought I loved so long finally noticed me and from that I end up with HIV and hatred which have finally quelled. I've trying going to college but I get sick everytime and now my brother is in a coma after some piece of trash hit my brother and left him for dead. I'm trying to hang in there for him and I don't care if he is gay if I can't love him reguard how can I love anyone else or God. But I'll try. I'm hanging by a tread. Thank you.
I’m very sorry….now I truly understand why you’re so upset. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I also pray that your brother will survive.
Thank you.