I came to an interesting thought while I was driving this morning. I had to turn on an exit and, in doing so, I realized that there was no OCD fear behind the choice of taking that exit. I wrote a blog this morning about my OCD fears and I realized, as I drove, that there were certain actions that do not have OCD fears attached to them. I wasn’t afraid of taking the exit. Why is that? Why do I have fears about some actions and not others? What makes me suddenly attach an OCD fear to something when, at the same time, I don’t give a fear to something else?
I believe that we have more control over our fears than we realize. If have chosen in the past to face what I am afraid of the most and have felt fine. On some days it feels as if the OCD isn’t even there. On other days, as I explained before, the OCD is always there and I can’t stop thinking about it.
I realized that I have the choice to face what I am afraid of along with the choice of letting the fears take over my thoughts. When I choose to face my fears then I feel a sense of peace that cannot be described because, once more, I have proven to myself that my fears can be defeated. Driving today I realized that I already have what I need to ignore my OCD. I won’t always do it because I will become too obsessed or too afraid. However, on the days that I do face the fears, I am able to feel as if I am truly free.
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