Well today didn't go as I wanted to. Before I go on with what happened today I should explain what happened last night. So I went to go DJ at my friend's hookah lounge. I don't like DJing there because the owners have there opinion on what I play. They don't like it much but since I haven't been there in a long time I decided to go anyway. Well after I DJ'd and they were closing they asked me if I was going to stay for the party they were going to do. I said I stayed. The only reason was that I don't really hangout with my friends that much. It was getting late about 2 a.m. so I said I would stay an hour. Well I left at 4 a.m. and I had work this morning at 8 a.m. So I only got a few hours of sleep. Work wasn't that bad. I hardly did anything plus people brought food so I have a decent lunch. Some cold turkey, a piece of the bread that I brought and a piece of apple pie that I brought. I wasn't really trying to eat that much because I wanted to be ready for when I eat with my family. I knew I wasn't expecting a lot of people over just my grandma, uncle, my parents and my sister. Plus I would get a nice cooked meal. I get home and say hello to everyone and just go to my room because I had a long day of collecting shoping carts plus didn't get that much sleep at all. I turned on the tv because I knew the noise would keep me somewhat awake so I should be good for dinner. Anyway I just fell dead asleep. No one woke me up for dinner or atleast I didn't hear anyone's voice telling me to wake up. I did feel my phone keep vibrating which I knew was only the "NFL updates" that I get so I kept sleeping because I didn't believe it was time for dinner. When I finally did wake up I noticed everyone was gone just my parents and sister there. Everyone had already late. I realized they wanted me to microwave my food and eat. I just didn't want to have cold turkey again. and using the mircowave to me dries out the flavor of the food. I don't like using the mircrowave for that purpose.Plus I wasn't gonna eat with the whole family now which brought me down even more. All day I see pictures online of my friends with their families having a good time while I have to eat alone and no family around. It was really sad to come to that realization. Meanwhile my cousin and her sister and my aunt were at there house trying to get me to come over. We have a family issue between my mom and my aunt which is pretty stupid. But anyways they always want me to come over and see them and I just thought why can't you just come here? That's why I didn't want to go. Got tired of me being the one going over there. Another thing I haven't come to grip my lonliness during the holidays. I really wanted to get a girlfriend before the holidays because I knew it was hard couping with another year of the single life. I kinda hurt that this year I had this expectation of that and having thanksgiving dinner at a girlfriends house and meeting her family and relatives. I should really stop having these fantasies. They are really hurting me. I honestly hardly said happy thanksgiving to anyone today. I guess not having a girlfriend gets to me. At work I've been in a crappy mode these few months well since I can remember. It's only gonna take one unhappy customer to get me fired or someone ticks me off the wrong way. I was gonna go off on this one lady the other day because I heard her tell her friend something about our security guard. Someone of the people I work with are arabic and that goes for the security guard. He's only doing what he's told and thats he has to check the reciept of the customer. It's very simple. Well I heard this lady said "how about I check his citzenship". That just rubbed me the wrong way talking about a person like that. Next time I hear that I'll go off on that person regardless of if I get fired. I guess that's all I have on my mind right now. I know haven't said it much today but have a happy thanksgiving to all who read this. I'm thankful for my family everyday and that I am here living in this beautiful place.


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