I feel the need to blog as im feeling so depressed and down right now. Yet trying to fight it and not get myself into a mood. I have work soon for 10 hours and I dont want to be frustrated with myself and depressed for that, because everytime I am, I take it out on customers who are being twats to me. Which is a good way to get sacked so I should stop it. I have been in such a good mood so far for the past dont know how long, but at work I haven't been stressed or angry, the odd customer has wound me up and got me a bit annoyed but ive not done anything about it otherwise id flip at them. I hope to somehow get back into a good mood so I can enjoy work as I am there for most of today. Me and my ex, who has recently been my friend and has been there for me as vice versa me there for him. We've been arguing so much these last few days and its getting to me a bit as hes ignoring me, which is worse than talking to me and arguing in my opinion because if there's anything I hate, its ignorance. I went out the other evening with people from work and although I dont drink, I had a couple :/ other people were and at the time I thought why not, ive not drank in months before that. Anyway I got home at stupid o'clock and my ex messaged me as to why im up so late, so I said and he had a right go at me because I didn't tell him I went out with people from work. he doesn't tell me half the stuff he does in terms of go out and who with, but I dont flip out how he has :/ its starting to wind me up trying to make me feel I was in the wrong for going out with work colleagues. Getting so annoyed over it. I can only think that he gets a bit jealous of me out with couple lads from work, although it was girls aswell. Deep down i think he cares and loves me still but don't want to admit it. He goes the wrong way about it though, always moaning at me and ignoring me. He knows it winds me up so he carries on. glad that i have somewhere to vent all my anger by writing it in blogs.