Been sitting here thinking about friends. A very long time ago I had tons of friends. Some good and some bad. I still kept everyone as friends. One day I was in a really bad spot and on a train from Colorado to Utah, and I wrote this poem that I titled “AIDS” and was about my friends mostly that were bad ones.Love does blind the heart and soul…But a more true destroyer of love is hate…It tears you from your closest friends.It's like a fire, sucking you into its deadly eternal flames.Love is the one emotion I prefer.The one person you truly love,You might not ever see again.Pain is the only emotion I see and feel now. Oh!! will this pain and emptiness ever find peace again?For now I must waite for death to come knocking on my door.I need to accept my fate and me alone.My soul has many sides…Some as dreary as ash floating down a well.Why is this disease like this you ask?Why is one of the things that is Experienced through this ordeal.It is quiet and dull as you can see.Death wont you come look for me?This shell of a body is worn out, and getting tired of the pain and sickness.People are afraid of me and I want to Mike V Simpson-RogersThat was the point in my life when I asked for someone to come into my life, someone that would be my best friend in good times, and bad. The other friends that stab you in the back when they have a chance are no longer in my life. I have such a small circle of friends that I can count them on one hand. But those true friends are like gold. They must be held close to your heart. It is always hard for me when I loose a friend. But, at the right time I shall find another. Friends are out there just talk to people. And if they can't handle whats in your(my) life then Astalavista Baby!!! Going thru one of those break-ups now, and it definitely a mourning process. I got the book out I got published in and read the poem. Made me grateful for what I have got now seeing where I was many moons ago…..

  1. ylaine 9 years ago

    wish i could write a story about my life its been a long hard road but one when you get this disease that everyone turns there back on you and then your alone thinking about dying but i am not wishing for that day. i feel that God has given us this disease for a purpose and out life is not done until He takes us. I have had a car wreck in 1985 and outlived five men in my life. have lost two of my sons and that is a hard way thinking of them on the holidays. i have a daughter on drugs and is wasting away so has He left me here to experience all these things with no one to love me or even care. My grandchildren dont visit thinking they would pick up a dirty syringe for my diabetes. I also wrote a poem its called Angels In The Sky but i will have to find it and put it on a blog. I never write blogs but your story touched me because i need someone to be my friend and love me in return.    ylaine

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  2. bseballfn73 9 years ago

    Wow the timing of your blog couldn't be more perfect. Sadly I don't have any words of wisdom….. just wanted to say that I can totally relate! I'm right now losing a friend from my life that was like a mom to me. Strangely… my hiv didn't scare her away…. it's my choice of religion that she's pushing me away over… who knew? My heart is breaking and I don't know how to make the pain stop…. I'm sorry you are experiencing this pain too.

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