I was on my way to work and listening to the radio (something I NEVER do).  I absolutely despite the radio.  Same old washed out songs being passed off as rock.  I can't stand it.  I get a small surge of joy when they announce Metallica coming on, and then come back down to depression because it's either "Enter Sandman" or "Fuel" or something like that. 

 Back to the subject at hand.  My heart is absolutely crushed.  When you tell someone you're in love with them, that typically means that you always love being around them and miss them when they're gone, right?  Yeah… I thought so, too.  Brittini hasn't contacted me in a week.  I still write to her every single day, just like I promised I would.  I can't help but think that she has found someone else.  First, she wanted to slow things down.  Then, she started going out a lot more.  Now, we're not even talking.  Did she break up with me and forget to tell me?  Is there a reason she doesn't tell me she loves me anymore? 

Then, I turned on the radio.  It was as if I had gotten a message from her.  Ironically, my favorite 3 Doors Down song.  I was sitting there, asking myself "What the hell is going on?  What am I not getting?" 

Then the song played.. "You love me but you don't know who I am…. just let me go"

"I miss you", "I love you".. that would be nice to hear right now.  Hell… even "I'm leaving you" would bring some kind of peace of mind.  At least I wouldn't be wondering anymore…

It's truly amazing.  Girls always complain about guys not appreciating them.  Then, when a guy who treats her like a queen comes along, they just call him weird and, in all probability, cheat on him and dump him.

How can she say she wants to be married to me?  If she doesn't want to talk to me not even 5 days out of the week, then how in the fuck is she supposed to live with me 365 days per year??

Is this what I quit drinking for?

Is this why I'm drug free?

Is it worth it?