I want to re-write what I have been thinking about for weeks now. It is an obsesion I certianly enjoy. I wrote all these thoughts down, only to tear them into tiny shreds for fear of them making thier way into the wrong hands.
I had made my way into what I feel is certianly God’s country. The elevation is higher. When the moisture rises from the ground,and the storm clouds form..it isn’t like it is in the valley, it is spectacular.
My first week was hard. I wasn’t usd to the camper, and I could think of was the black widow’s I had killed when I was re-furnishing it.
My OCD overwhelmed me, and sometimes I was overwhelmed by immense paranoia.
I would awake early, and drive a few miles to the nearest store, for coffee to charge me up for th day. The store I went to was a country store..and I was tickled by it’s charm. There they sold dried beans and hoop cheese, cast iron skillets, adn home made biscuite. THey had a porch, where there sat people who were the salt of the earth. I peered around, and saw a man which, at first glance, I thouht he had an appealing appearance.
He wore a uniform of some sort. He had a nice face.
Well, I began to become a regular at this store. I go in and get coffee..amd a paper.
But one day I went in and was struck with a feeling that went through me.
This morning I ordered an egg sandwich on wheat. As I waited for it, and glanced around the room. In one of the pine rockers sat that man. Our eyes met. He sat there very comfortably, hands clasped between his legs. I looked at his eyes, and he had this look on his face, almost like a boy, but he was man. I felt that look he gave me, and it ran through me. I felt like I was standing there naked. It was like he could see through me. But his hands, they were the biggest hands I had seen.This man was powerful.
This man made me feel like no one has, and he has never touched me. He made me feel the very essence of being a woman, and it was beautiful.
We have since spoken, and had chance meetings. He seems rather curious of my name, and what I plan for my days. He also seems rather shy..at a loss for words, just as I.
He smiles, and you can feel the gentleness of his soul. I have never met anyone quite like him.
So..he helps keep the bad thoughts out, because thinking of him, makes me smile:biggrin: