Would it make a difference if i was someone else. Or do you just want me to be someone else. I don't know. I know i'm not perfect but i try my best. I Love you rachael i really honestly do. How come you can't love me back. I'm sitting here your hoodie that you left behind. I'm not sure what to do. I wish you could believe me. I wish that you would believe im different from everyone else. I'm not a cheat, or some kinda whore who messes someone about. It makes me think that you only got with me because you was single and you wanted someone.

We are so different and it seems like everyone likes me and treats me nicely apart from the only person thats meant to and thats you. I'm so hurt by you and i just want it to all go away. I want to trust you so badly and its killing me. I want to belong to you i want to open up to you but im scared to lose you. You said you would never hurt me well….you fucking KISSED AMY…didnt you..when you know how much it would hurt me. I'm starting to feel traped.

You may say im obsessive but i'm really not. I can go a week without talking to you hell i can go 2 weeks if i must. I love you..yes but there is a diffference between obsession and love. I wish i mattered to you, like you matter to me. Your right i do desereve better becuase you treat me like shit…but the truth is i dont want any better i want you to love me i want you to be the loving gf that you where in the start. Maybe your bored of me and i don't blame you.

You know so much about me and i dont want to be just " another gf"  i want to matter……i dont want to break up with you….i want you to end it with me….i mean i should have when you kissed AMY…but did i no. Once a cheat always a cheat. Maybe its true…i wish i could trust you.