If I had any guts at all, I'd end my suffering. It seems those in this much pain should be allowed to end everything. I don't understand people who find strength to keep going. I have no one to talk to face-to-face about this…like I've said the counselors at this college are a joke when it comes to serious issues. I feel like I should just walk to the only sliver of hope I have left: the one therapist in this college town. They'd probably call an ambulance so fast I'd wonder if I was ever there.
That's one thing I've learned about depression and "talk" therapy. There is a line you must not cross and it differs with different therapists and people. I find myself looking for comfort in any form: food and self harm is looming over me like a cloud. What could a stupid Naltrexone do? I don't know and just don't have the energy to make myself take one. The Naltrexone is to curve the urge to cut. It is also used for smokers and drinkers. But my mom would never take medication to help her. She'll allow the doctors to give it to her daughter at 13 and make her dependent on them but she won't take them. WTF????? I find this fact totally….twisted (for the lack of a better word). She's told me–while she was spilling her guts about drinking too much–that medication for depression or any medication of that sort, she is against. I'm trying to understand where the logic in that is? I guess this topic is another invisible elephant in the room. She clearly can't control her drinking and medication may help her. She can read every book on the topic of drinking she wants but that only gets you so far. For her she has a week (or a month at the most) of not drinking then it's back to the "good life." I guess I still harbor some bad feelings. Oh what does any of this matter? No one cares or would notice if the negative blogs stopped.
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What is Love?
Somecure, , Depression, Depression, OCD, 0
This is no simple issue but nor does it have too be a difficult one either. Love for me...
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The 2015 Project (opinions??)
NotShakespeare, , Depression, Depression, Religion, Suicide, Weight Loss, 1
So i made a list, not just any list, but a list that i call "The Eye of The...
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More stuff.
sadjac, , Depression, Anger, Anxiety, Depression, 0
I don’t know why i’m writing alot latley. Its strange cause i’m one to normally keep everything inside of...
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The Beast
Tehycan, , Depression, Addiction, Anger, Anxiety, Child, Depression, Medication, Relationships, Religion, Sleep Disorders, Therapist, 1
I judge myself every day, every night, every moment. I always find myself defecient & inferior. I do what...
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My life is a nightmare
Jamaicat, , Depression, Grief, Lesbian, Gay, LGBTQ, Religion, Sexual Abuse, Sleep Disorders, 2
I had hoped my life would get better, but it gets worse every day. Getting up in the morning...
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Paid with blood…
Azura_Mikio, , Depression, Career, Child, 3
Been nearly a full year since I last decided to blog anything and much has changed to say the...
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Worthless and Pointless
sadviolinist, , Depression, Child, Depression, Medication, Sleep Disorders, Suicide, 2
Today I'm feeling really odd. I feel better for the most part than I've been in months, and while...
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Stupid words
unrest, , Depression, PTSD, Therapy, 0
Working with people who have mental illness while having mental illness myself I run into what I call stupid...

















