Hello everyone! I have not blogged in awhile. I hope everyone is doing good. I have started school again at a University….finally! I even managed to get a scholarship. Not a full ride but almost ten grand. It is a lot of work but I am majoring in accounting which i really enjoy.So i hope to be done in two years. Now to thegood stuff. OCD sucks big time but I have stopped ruminating almost completely. I have been off my meds for awhile and even managed to lose some of the weight that i gained whileI was on them. I am by no means OCD free i still have horrible intrusive thoughts most of the time. They seem to be getting worse in content but I feel like OCD knows that i just don't give a crap anymore. I'm just like oh yah…that is messed up…. whatwas i doing. I believe that i read somewhere when you start fighting back with your OCD it gets worse because it cant scare you as much anymore? I could be wrong. I have been wrong before. Then I read another article about trusting yourself. It really opened my eyes; that my brain can think up as much crazy thoughts it wants but I must trust myself that I know what I feel what I value and who i am to know I will never do anything. I believe someone posted it on here actually. I don't know I miss talking to people who know what I am going through. When I was first diagnosed this site gave me hope and a sense of community. When I am at school or even around my family and friends I feel like they would never understand me. That they actually might hate me because of my intrusive thoughts. I guess that is another part I struggle with that nobody really knows me because how could I ever tell them anything. I started out so happy and now I am depressing myself lol. Anyways thanks for reading 🙂