Is Klaus Hellwig not the coolest name you’ve ever heard in your life? Yeah.. mine too 🙂
Anyway, where do i begin? I’ve been seeing a doctor regularly and I’m officially bipolar, among other things. I’m currently on Paxil and it has me happy. the only bitch about it it when I miss a day or two, I start going through withdrawls. This isn’t good considering the girl that I live with is pregnant and won’t stay the fuck off my back. See, she’s in love with me, but I’m not in love with her. She’s 30 and ready to settle down and I’m 22 and just want a casual relationship. I don’t even want to see her every day and she guilts me about not thinking about her all the goddamned time. Now, there’s a good chance that she won’t be able to have the child. She has these complications that pretty much make her miscarry anytime she gets pregnant. However, she’s getting all excited and getting her hopes up and telling people, even though I had asked her not to as I do not want to see her set herself up for failure. This girl drives me up the fucking wall! She sleeps with a stuffed dog, can’t live without her cartoons, won’t get a job that requires her to take out her piercings, and sleeps when she’s not at work. In other words, she wakes up an hour and a half before she’s due into work, and then goes straight to bed when she gets off of work. Her diet consists of soda, sugary juices, fast food and little debbie cakes. She then proceeds to wonder why she is so out of shape, constantly fatigued, has frequent UTIs, etc. No matter how much I tell her, she doesn’t listen. After all, I’m just a dumb, immature little 22 year old. She’s 30 and so much smarter than I am, then how come I’m having to fucking carry her ass all the time? It’s driving me fucking insane. Even my doctor told me that her leaving would alleviate most of my stress.
Anyway, what else is new? I have less hours at work, which is both good and bad. My paycheck isn’t nearly as nice as it was, but at least I’m not trapped here all the time.
I’m gonna bitch for a second. When did smoking become something treated as a disease? The same ex-gf I was bitching about before really hurts my head with this one: She didn’t start smoking until she was 19 years old. She’s 30 now and is convinced that she cannot live without them. She’s even told me that if she had a choice to live without cigarettes or food, she’d go without food. How many times do I get stuck doing someone elses job at work because they "need a smoke"? NEED? I’m sorry (not really), but if you didn’t need it the first 19 years of your life, there is no good reason that you need it now. First of all, she can’t afford it. She HAS TO HAVE the expensive brands, and if she has a bad week at work, she just goes without gas and food, all so she can have her precious fucking cancer.
If I’m offending anybody, I’m sorry. I really am. But to put your life and financial stability in jeopardy for a pointless addiction is just pathetic. It’s no better than someone who "needs" meth, or "needs" crack. No different at all.
Anyway, I’m done for now.
Take care, all.
-Skot
