Day three, still irritable. Woke up at 11:30 only to hear more BS from my Mom.
"I pity your brother because he has to keep going to the garden to help pick potatos."
"Mom, he eats 3/4 of them…"
"Well, yeah…"
Then came even more of Mom's defending my brother, talking him up. Blah, blah, blah, he does so much, blah, blah, blah, he's the only one your Dad can count on, blah, blah, blah, nothing we do is ever enough, we're the only two who never get treated right unlike you who doesn't have to do anything and is his favorite, blah, blah, blah, poor me and my poor baby boy.
*gag*
I mainly stayed quiet because nothing she said is anything new which means that it's a rehearsed bit that she fully believes is truthful that you will never talk her out of believing.
I love picking potatoes. Especially since I hate dirt, had no say in how many were planted if any, and won't get to eat any of the said potatoes he wants me to pick. My family will eat them, my brother eating approximately 4 servings a day, every day because mashed potatoes are the only type of potatoes he'll eat so that's all Mom cooks 99% of the time. Sort of like how my Dad will only eat creamed corn so that's all we have for a vegetable every day, too.
Here's the best part – my older half brother who is about 37 years old will probably get about half of the potatoes as well. My Dad won't say so because we hate his wife because he and the little whore were flirting up a storm that resulted in them moving out of our rented property and into their own double wide trailer down the road something like 7 years ago. So yeah, Dad is planting twice the amount of food we need for the sole purpose of giving a vast majority of it to my other brother and his wife. And I gotta help pick it while Mom pities my brother – who is also eating them – for having to help and my older brother doesn't have to help at all.
My older half brother typically doesn't do anything to help my Dad despite being so close by and never tries to talk to anyone or help with anything. I gave up on talking to him a year or two ago. We're both adults, I'm not chasing after him like a stupid little kid anymore. Mind you, he doesn't get yelled at or insulted for not helping, my Dad thinks up reasons for why he can't be bothered.
He also wants to send my Mom, brother, and I up to his late mother's nursing home to pick up a chair he had bought her a few years ago. At first he didn't want it because "looking at it made him think of his mother" despite the fact that she was never any kind of mother and his aunt raised him. Now he wants it but when Mom said that if she goes and gets it she'll keep it, he got mad meaning that he either wants us to get it to give to his uncle or he wants to give it to my older brother.
I just told Mom I won't have time. I'm leaving the 31st, I'm not going up there on the 30th to load up some chair for someone else after picking rows and rows of potatoes for other people to eat that I didn't want to plant. I am soooooo out of here.
I think you have a good attitude about the situation: Why should you have to do something that you wanted no part in, in the first place? You can buy potatoes, so it wasn't a neccessity to grow them (unless he makes money from it?) and to make matters worse, your mother "pities" your brother? Would it not make sense to reason with you, offer you something in return?
Maybe you should be honest with your parents about the chair situation? My dad was also raised by his Aunt, because his mum was abusive and drunk etc – I made no effort to go see her when I realised what had been happening, she died a few years back and to this day, I feel nothing for her. Maybe you should show that you're old and wise enough to make these decisions and that in commitment to yourself, you can't help someone like that because of the immorality of the situation, rather than appearing lazy … however, if you are close to your dad, maybe you should find out if its important to him and why?
One of the hardest things I ever had to do is "break up" with my family. I have always held dear the desire to have a strong family who loves and understands me. I have come to realize that the feelings werent mutual and after years of trying and trying and blaming myself and being depressed over the fighting and etc etc that it was me who had to change. I had moved away from most of my family and now only hear about their continued drama and live my life elsewhere. I get lonely but I have realized how much less stress I feel by giving up my brothers and sisters and letting them have their drama. I am taking it slow and making myself step out of my safe "box" and trying to change myself. Trying to change someone else never ever works. You control you and you are the one who has to make the change. It is unfair, it sucks at times, but you make your own happiness. You commented on leaving on the 31st. I hope it is for a new beginning elsewhere with new adventures. There will always be sad time but dont let others control your behavior or your life. You have to answer for your decisions. No one else. Good Luck.