It's a gorgeous day outside, so I'm sitting on the back porch overlooking the pond. The temperature is right around 80 degrees, but I'm in the shade so I'm not bothered by it. I like watching the birds come up and feed;there's even one little cardinal who, when the birds are out, comes and shares foodwith my birds. They love it.

Today I'm doing a bit better, but still having random panic attacks. I was up at 5 a.m. this morning and I felt good, but around 8 I was getting very tired so I laid down with Aaron and slept for3 hours. It's a lazykind of day. There's notmuch ambition or motivationin me today. I just want to sit and be left alone for awhile. But I know thatas soon as Mom gets home I'm going to be hauling groceries up thestairs and putting them all away. Blech. I'm amgrateful though that we have food, I know many people aren't thatblessed, so I'll stop complaining about it.

I do need to run to thegrocery store myself to pick up a few things. I'll waituntil my Mom gets back and I've helped her to unload everything. So speaking of my Mom ~ she's still punishing metoday. When I got back from dropping my son offat school she was all dressed up and readyto go. I asked her what she was doing and she rattledoff a list. Normally she asks me to come with her, buttoday she didn't even bother. Then she gotmad at me for givingher a $300checkbecause she would have to rewritea new deposit slip. Seriously? Someone hands you 300 dollars and you get mad about it? I didn't get a thank you or anything.


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