This is a post to celebrate my dog. Of course god is dog backwards. The creature I live with is ridiculously amazing. Im a fool for him. Him. Chester. God knows if thats his real name. God know what language he thinks in. Perhaps he doesnt, perhaps he does. Anyway. Now I’m healthy we are becoming one again. Full throttle. I can’t deny the fact that I live purely for him in some cases. Because I love him. He’s my best friend. He’s angelic and athletic. He is my sports bud. Without him i wouldn’t be in recovery. Without him I would be in hospital.

The time in london where i had the darkest moments where because i knew i needed him. He isn’t a tool or a toy he is a gift. A spiritual gift. For that I am truly thankful. I think he knows how much i value him. I am dependent on him and his life force. He is so funny. He just eats from his bowl and smashes the day everyday. Wether he is given full attention or not he is at the front demanding everything.

Sometimes he sits on the chair in the front room. Head on the arm of his chair. I can’t believe this dog. We are unified. The more we exercise the more we want. He is attuned to freedom. He is extremely obedient. He is very smart. He doesnt care about any other dogs. He just cares about sports. Thats why i love him. He is an action dog. He doesnt like water very much. But he is very calm in the car. He likes to stick his head out the window.

So we will have a huge adventure into the forest and he will make his own way. We throw the ball and make our own games. Get covered in mud and venture home. Have some sleep and do it all again.

Sometimes we have to bath which is a nuisance. He doesnt like very much to dry naturally. I try to scrub him with a towel but mostly he shakes like a wild thing. I do have to admit that I must take him outside for longer periods. Since my breakdown I haven’t been as adventurous. I usually feel anxious after a few hours. Like i have to get home to be near computers or books. Which is nonsense now since I feel no compulsion to create.

I think that my fear mostly stems from not having another human to communicate with. But now my thoughts are less powerful I have more of a clear conscience. I can rest in the outdoors instead of wondering who is talking to me or sending me psychic messages – which is bullshit. The superstitious fiction i created. The loops gone.

Its just me being ordinary walking with my dog – talking about us. Good us.