Ok so I know why i feel sad and depressed .but im also relieved…because Im "healing" ..I think this is first day …i have cried since the night before i signed the offical divorce papers….I put my heart into someone who was a complete loser…a man who thought it was ok to slap me …even though it didnt happen but three or four times because i put an end to that…he didnt work…refused to support his family …I had two step kids…So i did what i could..but i always had to call my mom and dad ( who love me and care for me so much they are the worlds best) for 300 here 120 there .Then I watched him spend it on stuff we didnt need ..if mydad didnt own the place we lived we would have been homeless….I put my life on hold …and when I ouldnt put it on hold anymore ..I was 300 pounds I was without high school diploma (for other reasons) I was ready to move on and I did I start to lose weight alittle at a time I got my GED …My parents let us move in …took care of us …So when I made a choice to have a life changing surgery .he said that I must be cheating on him …( I was going to school at 6 am coming home cleaning up after him and me studying..And I went to the doctor he refused to go in to see how his wife was going to live better…thats when I knew I couldnt be in live with someone who had no concern for anyone but himself…I told him he had to leave….then found out that he had cheated a year before and had a baby …I was like wow…I did myself a favor………………………………However I felt so betrayed still even though he was gone …he still could hurt me …..And so I didnt have any peace of mind after that ….I just wanted to crawl in a hole….But Nov 17th I had to travel back to tenn to get a divorce…He signed a paper forfeit his rights ….cause he knew he didnt have to be there cause I would ask anything of him other then to get the hell away from me….SO that was a year ago and for a year I have been on emotional LOCK DOWN …better to not feel then to hurt….now I have decided to open up all the emotion I havent felt are rushing in Now. this sucks.
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My Story
LidiaE17, , Anxiety, Depression, Anxiety, Domestic Abuse, Obesity, Relationships, Sex Therapy, Sexual Abuse, Stress, Therapist, Weight Loss, 0
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virus, , Depression, Depression, OCD, Sleep Disorders, 0
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First thing you should do is do what they do in musicals, run down the street kicking your hells and singing the best most joyous song you can think of.
He sounds like a scumbag. You lose weight and he”s all threatened, meanwhile he”s the one who cheated on you to begin with…but natch, you”re the one with the ulterior motives. Ass that he is.
It”s just as well you didn”t sue for support (although you could have and it would be fun to nail the guy) because this way you can flush this turd down the toilet.
You are going through a rough patch now, but it will get better.
That is just awful. I”m sorry you are suffering, sweetie. Remember to take good care of yourself during this healing time–talk to people, get massages, take walks in the woods. Love yourself. It sounds cheesy but it helped me through my divorce from a total loser.
You sound like a strong woman. I”m sure you”ll weather this better than you think.