I am really struggling with perfectionism. My parents may be getting a divorce, which is unorthodox in our church, and I feel responsible for my baby sister. She\’s the one who gets left behind, so I wait for her. I know her heart is going to get broken if this happens, and my brain says i need to protect her. It\’s my job. Sometimes it\’s so bad that i call myself stupid and a failure because i forget to do something that day or i don\’t finish something i wanted to accomplish. I just constantly berate myself and i feel like a frickin PIECE OF GARBAGE, do you know what I mean? I am such a piece of garbage because look, i can\’t protect my sister. I can\’t save my friend from killing herself. I can\’t rememeber people\’s birthdays. i can\’t even stop myself from self- harming. so yeah, I\’ve been dealing with self loathing and perfectionism. I hate myself because I\’m not perfect. I think I need to be perfect to be loved. All my friends will leave me when they realize what a jerk I am. that\’s my problem.