Ugh.

My (ex) boyfriend is a lunatic. He laid his hands on me, we didn't see each other for some days, and then when we did he said wanted to break up, or something. He said it should have been obvious with the way he acted. Then he laid his hands on me again.

So, I don't know what to do.

Once he hurt me, went to jail, after that was sorry, sweet, wanted to get back together.

Once he didn't hurt me physically, but he did emotionally, was acting crazy, breaking shit, and went to mental hospital. He was being nasty, cold, cruel, wouldn't look at me, etc. etc. all I don't give a fuck if you live or die, but if you die I hope you go to hell, yeah, well, worse than this, and then a couple of weeks later bam!

He's all… I'm a changed man… I love you…

So here we are again.

I think he's bi polar.

It was like this, but not as extreme when we first started being together.

A few times it's been extreme… his… dr. jeckyl and mr hyde shit…

But it has never been this extreme. I fear what will happen if… I'll say if but I want to say when… he bounces back…

I fear what will happen to me. I hope I am strong. I hope I am smart. I hope the only thing I tell him is to get mental help and point him in the direction of a doctor's office.

I have told him a million times, mind you, that he needs mental help. He knows it too. Sometimes he wants it, sometimes he doesn't.

I can't take this. I mean, one day we're fucking, and another day he's lunging at me, biting me, pulling my hair, screaming…. telling me he wants to kill me…

Why did I put up with it?

Several reasons. I have to go. I will post them later. I bet whoever is reading this can guess right, though.

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