Hey 🙂

We all have problems, some worse than others, and that's why we're here. Right? Right.

Father's Day really got me down. But honestly, that's not what's been bothering me for the last few days.

So I'm going to tell ya'll a nice little short story. And maybe it will seem like teenage drama to you, it may seem insignificant to you. But it hurts me. I'm one of those people who keeps everything all bottled up, who doesn't trust, and who loves blindly and recklessly. I'll start the journey on my own, and then I'll find someone who I'll give my all to, and if they don't take it I crash. The ship goes down without it's captain and I'm left gasping for air in the middle of a sea of emotion.
Sometimes I think it's because of my Dad. His death changed me. I don't trust anyone and I close myself up. And I end up reckless and brokenly loving to the point of my own self-destruction.

So here's my story.

Once upon a time a young girl, about 14, met a boy who was three years older than her. That may not seem like a lot to most people, but to the girl's mother it was too much. This girl was struggling, still, to get over a tragic death that had shaken her thirteen year old world. The girl fell very hard for the boy. And he seemed to like her back. She fought with her mom daily, begging to be allowed to see him. Everyone told her he was wrong. He wasn't good. Her two best friends, practically her brothers, warned her. They threatened to tell her mom the truth about him (apparently they knew it all) so that her mom wouldn't even consider them seeing each other, she'd forbid it. They talked all summer, the girl desperate for his love and attention, all caught up in her emotion and wants and desperation for some sort of love.
Then they boy broke her heart. Completely. She cried and cried over him. Her "friend" had snuck out of her house and gone to see the boy and they had "hooked up." The girl was crushed. She refused to talk to him.
Some months later, she was in walmart and he texted her, apologizing and pleading for forgiveness, and she cried. And gave in.
They tried to stay friends, everything was weird, because she couldn't let go of her deeply harbored feelings for him.
The worse he treated her, the more she wanted him.
They spoke every once in a while, he was caught up in his own drama and she couldn't bear to get hurt again by his up and down feelings and rejection.

So, there she was at sixteen. He texted her, randomly, and it all hit her at once. He was now nineteen, almost twenty. He was so sweet, calling her beautiful and telling her he missed her and that he had been thinking about her. He told her he loved her. He said he hated not talking to her. He called her, and promised her that they would call each other at least once everyday. And he promised they would see each other that coming weekend, he said he HAD to see her. Of course, she loved his attention. And even though a few years had passed, she still cared about him. It was fine for a day or two all this sweet talking. Then he didn't talk to her. And they tried to make plans but they were both so stubborn and caught up in their stuff. He was caught up in what he wanted to do, she was caught up in wanting him. She had told him she was sacred, she had told them that she got hurt everytime they talked, and he said it wouldn't be that way again. He hadn't meant to hurt her. But here she was again, confused and hurt. She hasn't talked to him in a couple of days. She hasn't texted/called him, and he hasn't texted/called her.
But she desperately wants to talk to him.
Even if it hurts.

What should this girl do?

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