My wife and I have had a wonderful marriage for over 18 years. at first times were rough and we both were working our tails off just to make ends meet (who can't relate to that). Being an old fashioned kind of guy, I grew really aggressive and managed to worked my way up from a warehouse worker to a Senior Project Manager in a Major Telecom Company. As we began to get more money, I encouraged my wife to find the career that she liked and get her education and I moved more into the role of sole provider.
Last October, the pressure of the company buy outs and lay offs and general unethical behavior throughout the entire economy crash I went to a psychiatrist who advised me to seek outpatient assistance at a local mental institution. I was diagnosed with Anxioty , and bi-polar depression. I guess I was not really ready to hear it at the time so I did what I had to do at the time to get through and out of the program. Shortly after getting out my wife went through the program. She took it much more seriously than I did at the time.
Fast forward a month and I was laid off and looking for work, my wife was too. I made the mistake of taking the first thing that came along and less than two months later I was not only out of a job due to a manic episode, I was also not able to receive unemployment. I was now at rock bottom. I am so depressed that I can't imagine a day that I do not contemplate ending my life and my wife and two kids are looking at a stranger. But worse than that, it feels like my wife resents me more each day for something I don't feel I have any control over. I don't know what to do anymore.