:wacko: i had went to the doc a few week back (head doc), she had given me some new meds for alot of the symptoms i was having. she played it all down about the meds like it was no biggie well really its not but she gave me meds for schizophrenia. SCHIZOPHRENIA!!!??? thats like a taboo word. like only freaking crazy people have that. boy did i have that wrong. it seems that prolonged pot smoking will give it too you,. or should i say make the chances of it coming our better. so i have read everything i can find out about it. EVERYTHING!! ( i do that) read everything i can about something. which i guess is a good thing. thats all i can do is read shit. cant do anything else. too duhh for that. and the duhh is part ot the illness also. like i was saying. after i read this stuff i was like oh my
God i am skitzo. wow i really am. i almost sort of feel better knowing that my whole life there was a reaon for me to be so weiord and strange and not liked and duhh. i have a brain desease. its a very real desiease (sp) so what now?? the meds are making me feel so much better is unreal. like i finally had the fog takin off of me. i can think straight. i can get my work done. i get up and do things and not feel like i weight a ton and have this zingy lite headed feeling all the time. i read it can run in a 5 year cycle thing and i think so. i had my manic freakout for 5 years. the damn thing started out of the blue. thats what scares me. the suddeness of it. & it says that not knowing your ill or something is wrong is from the desease, the part of the brain that tells you that, thats part is damaged. so now what. i still want to quit the pot. i am messed up with this also. when i have plenty of it. i am almost sick of it and wanting to stop but when i get real low then i freak out sort of. i think its just the security of knowing i have it?? shot i dont know. i just really wanted to write about my head problems. i of course am not telling anyone other then hubby so i sort of want to get it off my chest. i will continue to say i am bi-polar. people will really think i am crazy then. haha. well i am out of here. i have things to do and the energy and the wanting to do them. i never have felt like doing things and now i do so i guess the meds are working. peace to all purple:yinyang:
-
Giving back – but what a day
dozerdandie, , Addiction, Codependency, 1
:boat: what a day. and i figure this is a good place to talk about it. i went to...
-
Step work
jjrocksarizona, , Addiction, 0
So why is it that some people in this program are sponsors when they themselves do not have a...
-
Thanksgiving
sbrtylove, , Addiction, 0
Wow Good morning all. I have not been on the site for a while to do really any...
-
I'm not alone !
jefwheels, , Addiction, Addiction, Anger, Anxiety, Depression, Domestic Abuse, Gambling, Sex Therapy, 0
Some things I’ve learned. Step one. The powerlessness referred to in any 12 step program is just a starting...
-
A insight into my mind or just a vent
Lishenia, , Addiction, Anxiety, Depression, LGBT, Marriage & Family, Addiction, Anger, Anxiety, Depression, Questions, 0
I just realized that I haven’t been on here a lot. Mostly because my life and my own mind...
-
More NA Ramblings
jjrocksarizona, , Addiction, Anxiety, Child, 0
1. Slow down. You are not responsible for doing it all yourself, right now. 2. Remember a happy, peaceful...
-
Lesson''s on life from a Dog!!!!!!!!!
jjrocksarizona, , Addiction, 0
Great lessons on LIFE….. from a DOG! If a dog was the teacher you would learn stuff like: When...
-
Buspirone N shame
NoClueNBlonde, , Addiction, Anxiety, Depression, OCD, Anxiety, Grief, OCD, 0
So I started buspirone May 6th. Tonight will be four full days. I started on a micro dose of...