I ran again today. I think what they say is true…exercise is a good way to relieve depression. I got this new app that might help with my problems as well. It lets you record your own voice with an affirmation that may help me with my problems. They say in sleep people are less likely to discard thoughts than they normally do when conscious. That's probably why we have fucked up dreams sometimes. Anyways, my affirmation was "you don't care what people think and you allow yourself to fully be who you are." I'll try the app in a couple hours here when I go to bed. Before that though I'd like to do something productive with my time. In my case its usually my interests….which can involve quite a few things including philosophy, science, art, music, and plenty of others. I really wanted to try this kind of science project on myself that I thought would be interesting. When I listen to music a lot of the time I will have images flow through my mind that sync up with what I'm listening to. It's pretty much like I'm creating a music video to that particular song inside of my head. Anyways, I have this album called ghosts, by Nine Inch Nails, and its about 34 tracks of music that really hasn't grasped on to any particular form yet. Consequently, that's exactly what trent reznor was going for when he created it. He made it to set the scene to various places in nature that he went out to so other artists in the world could make a music video to each song based on how the song affected them. Essentially I'm doing the same thing with his music. I'm gonna sit in my room and attempt to rid my mind of any thought, like you would do in meditation, and then when the images start flowing through I'm gonna attempt to map out the gist of them with chalk pastels. It may seem lame to you guys but I'm pretty excited to see what my mind comes up with when influenced by abstract trent reznor sounds lol. Hopefully I'll actually do it today and not just watch a couple movies until I pass out. Well peace out guys.

—Ryan