So yesterday I took my meds as I was supposed to. I was supposed to take my son to go hang out with friends and go shopping or go do something fun and I couldn't pull myself out of bed. Took a 4 hour nap and broke my sons heart because it was too late to go do anything. Today I swore I would take him to the mall. When I got up I was determined. But for some reason I guess I am having side effects from my meds which I have never had before and I can't walk straight. I almost fall over everytime I walk into a room or even just standing still have I have to make sure I am not leaning over. Tried to take a shower and kept feeling like I was going to fall in the shower which freaked me out which made me emotional. I am appologizing to my son telling him that I didn't feel safe driving this way and didn't know what I was going to do. So my daddy came to the rescue and took us to the mall. Felt good to get out of the house but I still felt like crap cause I couldn't take him myself. And then I came home and slept for another 4 hours. The meds help with the anxiety but they keep me knocked out most of the time. They upped the dosage but my word I would never be awake. You can't get better if you are taking that much crap. Still don't eat. Drink ensure all day. Eat pudding when I think about it. But Tuesday I have my procedure where they go down my throat to make sure all the muscles and stuff is working right since I can't eat solid food.. Hungry or not I can't swallow.. But hopefully that will all change. All I care about is my son is happy, he got to go shopping and he has new stuff so I am happy about that.
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yes I have talked to my son. He knows what is going on and he is my strength when I am not having the best of days. He is a great kid. He does whatever he can to make things better for me. I am very proud of him.