So, today hasn't gone so well. I hung out with Caitlan, Brandon, and Trey. I also told Caitlan how I felt about Brandon today. But, after I did, it seemed to me like she was flirting with him. A lot. It wouldn't suprise me, actually. What's really fucked up about this situation is that Trey likes me, but I like Brandon, and since Brandon and Trey are bestfriends, the "bro code" stops anything ever happening between Brandon and I. It sort of makes me sad. It does. But I'm not ready for a relationship. I just got out of one. I feel bad that I don't like Trey; He is so sweet, and nice, but I don't see myself with him. Like, I don't feel that "spark" or anything. But, with Brandon.. The story changes. I can't help but smile each time he looks at me. I know I just met them two days ago, well, technically I met Brandon is third grade, but I just feel the spark. You know what I mean? Like, everything about him I just.. fall inlove with. I really like him. He makes me get butterflies in my stomach. And that is something that no boy has been able to do in a long, long time. Unlike Trey, Brandon makes me feel like I am worth something. Like he enjoys my company. Not just to see my body, or try to get in my pants, but to just chill; Have fun. What scares me, is that I know I'm not good enough for a boy like that, and if Caitlan really wanted to, she could snatch him from me. I think. But something that is a fact, is that Caitlan always goes after what I want. It has happened multiple times. Like for example, Trey had this I <3 Boobies braclet, and I wanted one so bad, but Trey wouldn't give it to me. The braclet didn't catch Caitlans interest, until she saw how bad I wanted it. Guess who's wrist it's on? Hers. It just frustrates me, a lot. Don't get me wrong, I love Caitlan, but.. Sometimes I think she does things just to piss me off. Oh well, I don't know. Tomorrow is another day. So, let's see how it goes…
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