Yesterday marked a week. The farther I get along in this, the deeper I fall in love with her. My head’s spinning and (for once) my stomach doesn’t ache as bad from stress and anxiety. I mean, I even went to the length of dressing up for her today and, oh my god, I’m not used to feeling like this. A week ago, I had been single for 4 years and-and I can’t wrap my head around it. I want her here so bad! This is my deepest affection and it’s still strange to think the people I used to live with were homophobes and would have never accepted how I’m gender-queer right now (they dogged a 4th grader who wanted to be trans). I’m happy, but I’m worried, too. Relationships are WAY different with girls and the new experience is crazy! Don’t get me wrong, there’s amazing men and gender-queer people out there, too, but I just feel super connected to her. Like…Legos, you know? We just fit in the right place and create something wonderful. We knew we liked each other for a long time and we’re just now going out with each other, but, damn. I have GOOD anxiety for once, so I guess I’m super confused. I don’t even know how to keep this going or what to do or why I feel so feminine around her (etc.) and she says when we get to see each other again, she wants to take me on a date. I’ve been with 2, 3 other dates and never went on a date, so I don’t know what to do there, either. I don’t want to say something that’ll cause an argument or a break-up. I don’t have a lot of relationship experience (as you can see), so I guess I’m just excited/nervous for what’s to come. She’s just a wonderful person and I miss her greatly. I think it’s just super bizarre that this is TRULY, TRULY happening. But, I love her greatly, so I’m really lost right now…

4 Comments
  1. jason01 6 years ago

    Congrats..

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      piscesbs 6 years ago

      Thanks! I’m just everywhere and I’ve never had a crush this deep, so I guess I’m just super lost. The long distance thing’s rough and -I’m not gonna lie- there’s been a LOT of temptation, but I want to be loyal, so that’s what I’m gonna be. I’m nervous, Jason, but I’m excited, too (as mentioned). Is this a good thing or am I just a love struck fool?

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  2. deathcheetos 6 years ago

    Congrats! I hope it will go well for the two of you!

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